**Update 2** "Am I that different?"

3 months ago, I came here again, to catch you up on the life of myself.

Since then, I have moved house again, after my older brother took advantage of me, and dwindled away all my savings, stopped paying his bills, and relied on me to pay, to help him live. While he went off, and did - quite frankly - whatever the F*ck he wanted.

So I went homeless for 3 weeks, after getting thrown out, after not being able to keep up with my brother's bills, as well as my half. Landlord asked us to leave, at the end of the tenancy of 6 months, as he wanted the house back. (probably cs' late rent coming a week or so late, the last 3 months.) 

After going into a homeless accommodation and having a complete meltdown/overload, after a manager was showing us round and lied saying it's quiet. My parents' offered me at their house, thinking it'd be better for myself, and my health.

I'm now in my own 1 bed place in a town, where I can keep it clean, knowing it won't get messed up by my brother, and i can manage my bills, and build my savings back. Which is going extremely well this past 2 weeks, but now I'm starting to remember the constant feeling of isolation. I mean it's always there (not sure if that's the same for everyone.) but stress is a nice distraction. I finished counselling too, that helped slightly, improving my self esteem for a few weeks before it fell back to it's usual. 

Now, I'm sort of lost, and was hoping for some sort of "miracle advise" from a Neuro-typical, to help me understand.... or from someone like myself, Autistic, who has came through and found a solution to this problem.

The problem is, meeting people- Girls to be exact - but not completely just them. I find social interactions confusing. I want to meet, and make friends, and even from romantic relationships. I'm in a few clubs (hobby type ones- not the nightclub type.), but i find myself being slightly withdrawn from the groups I am a regular part of.  SO, I thought, how does introducing and pushing these regular acquaintances or strangers to friendships, and then more if I so desire?

Google doesn't cure everything, and apparently. Just doing it, until your confident will help. But I can't see that being the case for me.
I feel approaching strangers, Girls especially is sort of wrong, they get enough unwanted attention without me following the rest. But then, how do you know when to approach, or how to.  
I'm TOTALLY lost.

Parents
  • I can understand what you're going through. I rely on a partner for the bulk of my socialising but I split up from my ex in Dec and have suffered from loneliness since. I've just had two weeks off work over Easter, for 5 days in a row I did nothing and was severely depressed by the end of it. I've never met a partner f2f, the initial get together has always been via dating sites, such as POF. Have you tried internet dating? That could help to cut down on your nerves of knowing when a women does, or doesn't want to be approached.

    I start a new job in a new city tomorrow. I'm not ready for internet dating yet but to help me make friends in the meantime I'm going to start volunteering. I'm looking at helping out at cookery classes for disabled kids, as I'm better with smaller, quieter situations. Have you ever created a list that describes how you socialise best? You could use that as a basis for picking volunteer opportunities if you do want to do more things to fill your week.

    Like others have said you are already doing remarkably well coping with everything life has thrown at you lately. I wish you all the best.

  • Online dating has always been horrible for me, it just makes me worse.
    Maybe I should look into some better ones though, it's the Tinder type ones, that really annoy me. I guess with dating sites, you know they're hoping to talk and mingle.
    Last night was quite horrible, after this post, my mood went downhill. I then overloaded. slept eventually at 2am, and now im up again- gonna need a nap.
    Good luck with your new job, volunteering might be cool. I used to struggle with stuff like that since i had to take busses to get to the town. But now im in the town.
     
    For now, I'm taking it easy a few days. 

    Thanks for your input.

Reply
  • Online dating has always been horrible for me, it just makes me worse.
    Maybe I should look into some better ones though, it's the Tinder type ones, that really annoy me. I guess with dating sites, you know they're hoping to talk and mingle.
    Last night was quite horrible, after this post, my mood went downhill. I then overloaded. slept eventually at 2am, and now im up again- gonna need a nap.
    Good luck with your new job, volunteering might be cool. I used to struggle with stuff like that since i had to take busses to get to the town. But now im in the town.
     
    For now, I'm taking it easy a few days. 

    Thanks for your input.

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