Therapy for Autistic Behaviour?

Apparently I'm to have a 'course' of six - eight group sessions to "help me come to terms with" my diagnosis and to "teach" me about autism. I'm not entirely sure how I feel about this and don't really know what to expect from it but I'm willing to give it a shot. Mainly because I've complained long and loud about the lack of services re. autism in my area and feel that when they finally get around to providing this service, the least I can do is give it a chance. 

I'm dubious that this proposed course will be able to provide me with anywhere near as much (or as useful) information as I've found on this forum. The professionals who will be giving this course are currently in training for it (as I sort of have been too with all of the research I've done since diagnosis) and I suspect they'll probably know just about the same as me when the time comes but I'm willing to give it a try, give it the benefit of the doubt. The worst that can happen is that I won't find it useful, although I am a little concerned at the idea of group sessions. (Okay, more than "a little" concerned!)    

lol

Yuck! "groups"!  Worse! "groups of NEW people" . . . 

You shall have to get on and bare it now you've complained LOL ;)  That will teach you . . . he he ;)

No, all jokes aside, I went on one about ADHD and it was deplorable. The title of if was ADHD and ADD something or other.  I pointed out that ADHD has not been called ADD since 1987.  I don't like disorder, classifying or grouping things incorrectly.  It's very difficult for me and that set me off straight away! Ha!

It also made wonder what they actually knew if the title of the group was so terribly flawed and hadn't been called ADD for 20 years.  Experts talking in a group would surely know this?  They lost me with the title.  I was long gone! lol

But if you go with the attitude of perhaps co-educating rather than expecting a revelation on Autism imparted by a neurotypical person then it might be useful if not for you then for them!  Though that kind of defeats the object I accept.

I agree this forum is by far the most useful place for me to get the 'real deal'.

I love this forum.  I'm so scared I'm going to go for my Autism assessment and be told that I'm not autistic now.  I shall be devastated if that happens now.  The waiting is unbearable.

xx

Hopefully you wont have to wait too long to find out, it seems to vary a lot across the country. If the result isn't ASD, but you feel you definitely identify with ASD and with people here, there's no reason why you shouldn't still use this forum. There are a lot of self-diagnosed people here too!  

For myself (and maybe Cloudy Mountains if I've read things properly?) I went into the room in my ultra-capable 'Official' mode, my 'here to sort things out and get a straight answer' mode. I had on my 'about town' clothes and even took notes with me in my bag!

It started going to pieces (little inside-the-head freakout) in the waiting room (hate those) but when I got in there and she was equally capable, professional and straight-talking in a sort of 'man-to-man' way, I practically felt myself crumbling. So, it's not that I managed to go into it mask-less (How would I have left the house like that? Travelled there like that? EEEEKKK!!! Does not bear thinking about!) more that they all fell away once I got into the room and started talking. 

Ordinarily (although it's not ordinary at all for me to be out and about as private me) if I find a mask crumbling under scrutiny I simply shut-up or leave. Those weren't options at the assessment and so I was sort of stranded there, kind of. Wanting to do it, fascinated and intrigued about what the assessment might show, but I felt about ten years old again at some points. 

It is very weird! If you can, take time out after it.  

Hahahaha, I don't know but I've got no skin on the toes on my left foot pretty much. It started with a patch of eczema. Now it looks like hamburger meat. I sound so hygenic and presentable, lol. This is getting weird but funny!

Dumbo could fly! If I tried my now deformed, twice as heavy as the other ear, would make me crash to earth with a thump! Oh and another "stim-lite" I have is slyly smelling vinegar. When I'm alone I huff it like an 80's glue addict. Vinegar makes me relaxed, odd thing but yeah. Well at least we can discuss it here!

Too Late! They're both enormous and stick out like Dumbo's. 

Oh my life, I've just googled it - it is a massive thing with Autistic people :O 

:O Please don't tell me picking spots and scabs is part of this?  I do that so much!  I love picking.  Peeling sunburn as well.  I get a real thrill out of it - Oh Yikes, is that part of this as well lol 

I'll start a thread then! "stim-lite" is what I call it. "Extra proof stim with a cappuchino froth" is far more satisfying though! I have a cauliflour ear from a scar I had on my ear that turned into a "stim-lite" spot! Stay away from the ears, lol! If you can!

I'm actually already trying to imagine it in my head, me in the room with the assessor!  Without a role?  Who will I be?  I will be VERY self conscious is what I will be . . .

There is no "role" to whip out in this circumstance?  It will be very very weird!

This is what it feels like Endymion, a bit surreal?  We've so busily buried our 'odd little friend inside' that bringing her into the room to be talked about - is a bit of a shock for her!

I've so desperately tried to be 'normal' and that has been for sooooooooo long.  Talking about it face to face with someone is very odd.

I've not really done it yet.  Only with my husband.  Easy to do it on here anonymously and amongst 'like minded people' but I'd imagine it leaves you feeling a bit exposed and like all the roles you've created for yourself are suddenly "shattered" - so then you are just left with who you are?  Except you are not quite sure who that is in the public domain because she's never really been allowed out.

It is a bit like a "shattering" a kind of re-birth.

I hope I'm not explaining it very badly.  My roles hold a lot of safety.  They are familiar.  Not using them I imagine will feel quite surreal and weird.

I haven't been that odd little person in public since I was a child and I soon learned that she was not very welcome and I so worked hard from about age 10 to cover her up and bury her from the outside world.  Now I've got to undo that?

No wonder you were so tired!

I think you could easily break a record for number of replies if you were to post a new thread about "stim-lite"!! I didn't think I had any either until I read more about it   : )   

I think I do all of mine on my own, at least I can't think of any that I do in public. When I've been caught fiddling with my ear or pressing my skin or whatever (by family members mostly, at home) I just feel embarrassed. Not sure why exactly except, I suppose, I was always told as a child that these things were weird / stupid / moronic etc. I don't particularly think they are but when you're told something often enough as a child it sticks with you somewhere in the back of your mind.    

As @Cloudy Mountains referred to earlier, a decent assessor should be able to spot our well hidden, well practiced, cover-ups and will / should ask you about them. As you said though, it definitely pays to be as open as you're able to be about everything anyway. 

It's VERY exhausting being assessed though! I came out at the end feeling ... stripped. Sort of exposed to my very core, feeling simultaneously "Oh my god, I did NOT just tell them all that!?!?" and "Some of that CAN'T be true, I AM 'normal!!! Just act 'normal' GODDAMMIT!!"  I don't know, it was weird. I was 100% honest with them but that in itself was the problem because it was all such private stuff.

I felt quite shaken after it because, like you, most of that stuff I'd never spoken about with anyone before. The hardest part was walking out of the building, into the street, and through town feeling ... opaque (?) I think that's what I mean    : /    I don't regret it (now) but it was a difficult day.  I think I went to bed as soon as I got home (before 7pm) and slept in the next morning. Even my lovely brain was in shock   : )    Being open and honest with NT's like that is like an evening with Dracula.  

Yeah I do the "middle of the nose trick" but with the shoulder area. My dad barely looked up from the Racing Post enough to notice if I was looking at him. My mom and I have our suspicions about my dad having ASD. He has a memory for stats that is savant-like. He will only wear one type of shirt and freaks when his routine is broken. He acts more on the spectrum than me!

It sounds as if you are stimming to me! "Stimming" is a repetitve behaviour like rubbing, rocking, tapping, e.t.c. Spinning and pivoting like your son does is another stim, and yes I've seen it done like Baryishnikov! There's a girl in my group who jumps up and down. Some are subtle others are less so.

When I'm alone I squeeze my scalp as hard as I can. It feels good. When I'm in public I rub the top of my head as much as I can. I would like to crush it but I have to go for "stim-lite"!

I look at people when they are talking to me.  Mainly because my dad 'chastised' me for not doing so as a child.  He said "not looking in someone's eye made me look dishonest" - only dishonest people don't look you in the eye!  Terrified of appearing dishonest, which goes against every grain of my very being, I discovered that if you look at the middle of their nose, they cannot tell where you are looking and so I have done this.

However, when I am talking I look away and that I cannot stop or use a 'trick' for.  I simply can't do it.  My memory is visual and so actually I'm usually not looking at anything at all.  I am looking inside my own memory.

I don't really understand 'stimming' and if I do it?  Perhaps it may be more subtle in me?  My 8 year old clearly 'stims'.  He flaps his hands and spins round and round.  He has non verbal ASD (with very high support needs), he's severe sight impaired and has Cerebral Palsy and so has motor co-ordination problems.  However when stimming he spins with the precision of a ballerina and would give the late Michael Jackson a run for his money with his never ending 'pivoting'.  He rarely loses his footing.

Can anyone explain 'stimming' and if it can be more subtle than my son's?  I scratch my head a lot.  Not because it's itchy but because it seems to make me feel better but I don't know if this can be called 'stimming'.  I also touch myself a lot.  So I rub or stroke areas "say my legs" when anxious or in deep thought.  But I don't fully understand it and if any of that qualifies?

I'd be interested for peoples feed back?

Thanks in advance.

I don't look people in the eye. I do not look at people when talking to them. I look somewhere else.

I love stimming.

I also go into full stim mode when I'm alone.

I restrict and control myself when I am not alone. But still often slightly stim to relieve anxiety and stimming also gives me pleasure. I so enjoy it.

The lady that diagnosed me noticed one of my masks. I don't look people in the eye, I look at their shoulder. She noticed that and asked me about it, that lead into her asking me about strategies for masking I'd developed. She was very perceptive. I hope mummytosix gets someone who is so perceptive. She also noticed my sly stimming, then asked me if I stim differently on my own. I go into full stim mode when I'm alone.

I got into a conversation with my ex partner today about fabric designs. She makes her own clothes. I'd remembered 10 years worth of fabrics she bought. I ended up babbling on about different chiffons, velveteens, prints e.t.c. She said "God you remembered it all, I can't get a word in edgeways". I then said "Funny that really, because I couldn't give two shits about fabric". We both stopped and started laughing. I like my long brain farts sometimes.

I cannot agree more.  This is what I'm going to do.  It's a little bit hard though because until now, until meeting you all.  I'd hidden all these things inside.  I didn't speak of these things to anyone in case they thought I was a bit crazy.  I knew I wasn't crazy but if you didn't ever hear anyone speak of or describe doing this before then you would probably keep it quiet!  So It's strange for me to open up what I have been doing for so long!  Yet I agree, it is essential for someone assessing me to understand.  This is the one time that you MUST NOT play a role.  It will be strange because I am so used to doing it . . . What it feels like to be around people but always feel 'outside'.  I think this is why I always want to leave quickly, to get back to being on my own because that feeling is not pleasant really.  It can be very lonely.  At least it was when I was young.  Now I have my family who I am myself with and who I feel mostly part of x

Ha! That is mischievous, except I will probably do that anyway lol

I start a conversation and before I know it, I am telling a story, within a story, within a story and by the end I cannot remember what the point of the original story is :O 

Strangely though.  Once someone has 'lost' me and I am no longer enthusiastic about them.  Then I won't talk at all and I will sit there and say nothing.  Absolutely nothing. I am like this at my mother in laws house.  I don't speak.  I've learnt not to really speak because I am soon cut down so I don't really say a thing.

All or nothing, All or nothing.  This is me. x 

We are a strange lot.  I love it!  I love that we are all a little bit strange.  I love strange and I love different.  I am fascinated by everyone and their own little bit of different.  There are millions of us!  It is fantastic!  Like snowflakes.  All of us the same 'type' but each uniquely different.

Ha! That is mischievous, except I will probably do that anyway lol

I start a conversation and before I know it, I am telling a story, within a story, within a story and by the end I cannot remember what the point of the original story is :O 

Strangely though.  Once someone has 'lost' me and I am no longer enthusiastic about them.  Then I won't talk at all and I will sit there and say nothing.  Absolutely nothing. I am like this at my mother in laws house.  I don't speak.  I've learnt not to really speak because I am soon cut down so I don't really say a thing.

All or nothing, All or nothing.  This is me. x 

We are a strange lot.  I love it!  I love that we are all a little bit strange.  I love strange and I love different.  I am fascinated by everyone and their own little bit of different.  There are millions of us!  It is fantastic!  Like snowflakes.  All of us the same 'type' but each uniquely different.

I got into a conversation with my ex partner today about fabric designs. She makes her own clothes. I'd remembered 10 years worth of fabrics she bought. I ended up babbling on about different chiffons, velveteens, prints e.t.c. She said "God you remembered it all, I can't get a word in edgeways". I then said "Funny that really, because I couldn't give two shits about fabric". We both stopped and started laughing. I like my long brain farts sometimes.