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Not understanding how I feel?

Goatworshiper

I would never describe myself as suffering with anxiety, but i've just read a bit of a book on amazon (http://www.amazon.co.uk/Asperger-Syndrome-Anxiety-Successful-Management/dp/184310895X/ref=sr_1_4?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1337544870&sr=1-4 page 195) and that is my way of behaving in social situations as a child. I just didnt enjoy playing, but I'd never thought of it as anxiety.

One of the things I keep seeing in relation to anxiety and depression, but to be truthful I  feel more muddled. That's If I have AS (which im 99.999999999% sure I have). Did anyone else through the time of going through diagnosis feel unsure about there identity? I feel a bit weird on this front.

Can anyone recomend any decent books in relation to this or just good general Autism/Aspergers books for adults. I've been cautious not to read so far, as I dont want to influence a diagnosis. I don't want a false diagnosis if you know what I mean. But sod it, curiosity is getting the better of me.

Parents

  • Today I had a task to do at work. Record 3 vocal actors; then 5 actors singing a song. All were students. I didn't know anyone other than the lecturer that accompanied them. I was racing around trying to make everything "perfect", recording and mixing is one aspect of my job Im confident in. I had lots of experience in it prior to stating this job and most of my University dissatation was based around this area. Prior to starting I had everything loaded up in Pro-Tools as I don't like people observing me unessasarily. The mics, were in position, the headphone moniters were ready etc. However I noticed the lecturer was talking to me differently than normal, maybe concerned. I then noticed I was a bit jittery. What makes this odd is the lecturer whom is very very good at her job is a bit of a ballbuster, who can run people into the ground. So it was quite alarming that I got this softer tone and it's being playing on my mind since. I wonder if this is the anxiety that people talk about?

    Not sure if recognising feeling (if that's what ive done?) is good or bad? 

    If I can't control them I wonder if it's benificial to know. hmmmm.

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  • Today I had a task to do at work. Record 3 vocal actors; then 5 actors singing a song. All were students. I didn't know anyone other than the lecturer that accompanied them. I was racing around trying to make everything "perfect", recording and mixing is one aspect of my job Im confident in. I had lots of experience in it prior to stating this job and most of my University dissatation was based around this area. Prior to starting I had everything loaded up in Pro-Tools as I don't like people observing me unessasarily. The mics, were in position, the headphone moniters were ready etc. However I noticed the lecturer was talking to me differently than normal, maybe concerned. I then noticed I was a bit jittery. What makes this odd is the lecturer whom is very very good at her job is a bit of a ballbuster, who can run people into the ground. So it was quite alarming that I got this softer tone and it's being playing on my mind since. I wonder if this is the anxiety that people talk about?

    Not sure if recognising feeling (if that's what ive done?) is good or bad? 

    If I can't control them I wonder if it's benificial to know. hmmmm.

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