Published on 12, July, 2020
I can chit chat away but at the centre of things I find it incredibly difficult to express my feelings and what I want and need. As a result I can feel isolated and unsupported. Does anyone else have this issues and what strategies to you use to help manage this.
thank you.
A typical aspie-NT conversation about feelings:
NT: What’s wrong?
Aspie: I don’t know.
NT: You look upset.
Aspie: . . .
NT: Are you sad? Angry?
NT: It’s okay. You can tell me.
NT: Fine. Don’t tell me. I was just trying to help.
Definitely struggle with this. Usually when something has made me anxious or angry but i can't put into words why. A typical example would be something like a last minute change of plan. Perhaps i was meant to meet someone in town at 11am and that morning they alter it to 12. Logically if i was going to be there at 11 i would also be available at 12, so as far as they're concerned it makes no difference. But it would cause my anxiety levels to rocket. If they realise that i'm feeling irritated at them there is no way for me to explain why. Even as i say this i realise it sounds totally unreasonable. I'm still working on the strategy bit!
Yes small changes like that throw me too. Are you ok or how are you really does too.
Yes i find 'how are you?' a really difficult question, particularly if it's more of a greeting e.g a work colleague. I'm liable to either freeze and say nothing, or say something totally odd like 'it's raining' haha. I don't know why it's such a hard one, but i suppose it's the fact that you have no idea how much information they want (if any).
I think maybe i should write 'fine thank you' on my hand as a reminder because it always goes straight out of my head when i get asked
Yes I have tried both of those too when I remember that is. Yes makes me feel like I'm difficult too because I don't want to lie about it either. very well described.
I’ve tried the throw back before ....quite entertaining how it throws people.
hey DC...bloomin hell....check out that unicorn.
cue running!