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How do you guys explain yourself to other people?

Einfallspinsel

I just recently realized that what I think of as buffer overflow is officially called sensory overload. I mean noisy busy babbly situations that "drain my batteries", so I leave. If I stay, my perceptions sort of... stop adding up to a meaningful whole, and eventually I "forget" what talking and moving is. (Luckily it only rarely gets to that point because I stay away from these situations.)

But for example last week I made the mistake of trying to go to a concert (being over 30 I thought I could handle it by now!), and I just barely escaped. ;-) I paid, unsuccessfully tried to be invisible for half an hour, and fled before the band arrived. I didn't sleep that night and my knees were still trembling the day after (no drugs!). I couldn't explain to my friend why I walked out on her ("because everything was wrong"?).

And now I heard my company is planning another "team building" day. I don't want to go, or at least I want to be left alone, but how do I explain that to them? (I'm glad as heck I have this job, I don't want to jeopardize it.) What if I go braindead there too, or stop talking or look away? It just makes my colleagues try harder to "cheer me up" (Like last year, where I eventually left the campfire and stayed away from the madness in a sleeping bag at just above freezing)

Do you have some advice how I can get the message across, do you ever have this problem? 

It's not against my colleagues and (potential) friends that I prefer to be alone. From my point of view, it's rather a compliment that I invest the bit of energy I have in them sometimes. Guess that's not much of a compliment. 


I have no excuse not to go, other than that I hate pretending to be fine while I'm not. I am not even officially diagnosed with anything -- I just see quite some overlap with your list of ASD symptoms, and was hoping for some advice from people who might at least understand what I'm talking about.
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  • Thanks for your reply, I do the "I'm tired" thing a lot too. :-) So if you have an official diagnosis, you can actually use that as an excuse when you're overwhelmed? Nobody says "pull yourself together and have another beer"? 

    I applied for an adult evaluation a few years ago, and the psychiatrist told me she would not give me an appointment (or even look at the stack of questionnaires that I filled in) because the anamnesis questionnaire that my parents provided showed zero indication. And also they were booked solid until forever and had no time. 

    My parents then proudly told me they had checked all the "right" boxes and "saved me from losing my job", and I should never talk to anyone ever again about "this"... Huh? Foot in Mouth(NB: my employer had nothing to do with this evaluation.) 

    My parents are of the generation who thinks non-physical disabilities are exclusively caused by a weak character and bad parenting (they think they will be blamed). How can I get a diagnosis without anamnesis? 

    I'm not so sure my colleagues or boss understand what "Asperger's" means (that's why I started this thread). One of my colleagues has some obvious Asperger's traits too, and they are utterly puzzled about her. (She's not diagnosed and like myself she doesn't see herself as someone who needs help from the state...) My colleagues would find it hard to believe the two of us are in the same category, because she can be bubbly and is obsessed with relationship drama and I'm not.

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  • Thanks for your reply, I do the "I'm tired" thing a lot too. :-) So if you have an official diagnosis, you can actually use that as an excuse when you're overwhelmed? Nobody says "pull yourself together and have another beer"? 

    I applied for an adult evaluation a few years ago, and the psychiatrist told me she would not give me an appointment (or even look at the stack of questionnaires that I filled in) because the anamnesis questionnaire that my parents provided showed zero indication. And also they were booked solid until forever and had no time. 

    My parents then proudly told me they had checked all the "right" boxes and "saved me from losing my job", and I should never talk to anyone ever again about "this"... Huh? Foot in Mouth(NB: my employer had nothing to do with this evaluation.) 

    My parents are of the generation who thinks non-physical disabilities are exclusively caused by a weak character and bad parenting (they think they will be blamed). How can I get a diagnosis without anamnesis? 

    I'm not so sure my colleagues or boss understand what "Asperger's" means (that's why I started this thread). One of my colleagues has some obvious Asperger's traits too, and they are utterly puzzled about her. (She's not diagnosed and like myself she doesn't see herself as someone who needs help from the state...) My colleagues would find it hard to believe the two of us are in the same category, because she can be bubbly and is obsessed with relationship drama and I'm not.

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