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Overthinking / Anxiety

Pippy

Hi,

I just wanted to ask for advice on this.My daughter is unwell and I’ve had to take time of work. But I feel like im stuck between a rock and a hard place because I want to go to work but I know I have to stay with my daughter. I have no one else to look after her . But yet I feel this pull to what/need to go to work. Work are fine with me and I really like my job. But I also feel like im letting them down by not being able to go in even for a justified reason. 
Im suspected ASD +ADHD. Im constantly trying to think of ways to make the time back or even work from home. My work has been really fair with me and yet my mind will not stop going over the situation and wishing I could go into work. 

And then I feel guilt towards my daughter for feeling like this instead of just looking after her as I should,

I don’t know if any of that makes sense. The anxiety pit in my stomach is unbearable 

  • Hi Pippy. I hope your daughter is feeling better. I had time off with my daughter as carers leave when my daughter had spinal surgery. It's a hard one isn't it. I have worked from home when my kids had been off with colds though it is not ideal because it's not very effective working.

    I know I found it extra hard when my kids were young. You know when they always seem to be ill. It has got easier now they are older.

    The other thing I find hard is that it is always me that ends up having to take time off, rather than my partner. From a practical and financial point of view it makes sense, but I do find it difficult sometimes.

    Working and having children is mega guilt territory I find. And the pressure to be the 'perfect mother'. It is almost inevitable to feel anxiety.

    Take care

  • Hi Pippy,

    Sorry to hear that your daughter is unwell and you've been experiencing anxiety about work. You might want to have a look at the anxiety page here on the NAS site - https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/mental-health/anxiety - which has some information, advice and tips on getting support for anxiety for people on the autism spectrum. There are links at the bottom of the page to related subjects, including anxiety and the workplace, that may also be of some help.

    Best wishes,
    Ross - mod