Lying ?

Hi LeanneC91,

This is a really difficult situation and I really feel for you.

You said something about the situation is pressing your alarm bells; that it doesn’t feel like other times when your son has exaggerated in the past. Trust your mum instincts. From what you have said, it sounds as if something about this taxi driver has not sat entirely comfortably with you and has been nudging at you for a while, even prior to this event.  This instinctual unease you have had for some time about her is enough, (for me) to have requested a different driver, and at the very least, for you to do so now.

I think you have to tread gently, continue to be open minded, just as you are being, trust your son, continue to give him the benefit of the doubt, while remaining open hearted to being proved wrong, if needs be.  As, it is other people’s jobs, like the taxi drivers employers, your schools Safeguarding Officer, to consider all sides of the situation and to support you in taking this situation further if needs be.  It is not your responsibility alone to prove (or disprove) the facts of this incident; it is your job, however, to trust your son, trust your loving mum instincts and seek to protect your cub, just as you have been doing.

The taxi driver must have to follow some sort of procedure regarding this event, such as filling out an accident or incident report. Which you (and the school) have a right to request a copy of. I would make sure there is some sort of ‘official’ paper trail of this event, completing a Safeguarding Form through your school would be an excellent place to start, sometimes these forms are simply filed as, through the process of completing them, no risk has been found, but sometimes these forms go to the LA if a potential risk has been found. Your schools Safeguarding Officer will know about all this process and will complete this form with you. If school don’t want to complete one of these forms about this incident, ask them why they don’t. I sincerely believe you and the school must complete a Safeguarding form about this.

Maybe a concern letter to your Local Authority (cc in the firm) who contract out the school runs to the taxi firms too. Realistically, very little may come from this event for you or your son, (unless you decide to press charges with the police) but, if a similar event were to ever happen again in the future with this same taxi driver, that is when your paperwork may prove most useful in helping to protect other young people.

If you do write to anyone about it, be very careful NOT to directly accuse the taxi driver in any way, but to simply frame your letter as a (fair and reasonable) concern from a parent, that your son said or seemed to think A, B, C.. happened; that you spoke to the Safeguarding Officer at school, (and completed a safeguarding form with school) that you and the school decided not to take it further because, or you decided to take it further because; that type of thing. You see, the LA may have had other complaints about this firm or driver, you never know.

Remember it’s not your responsibility to prove the taxi driver guilty or not guilty, and it’s okay and appropriate to be a concerned and loving mum. Definitely request a different driver immediately though, in support of your son, don't make him take a taxi with this individual ever again, for his safety and for hers. And let the 'official' Safeguarding channels in your sons school take care of this process for you, that is exactly why they are there.

Best of luck.

Hi LeanneC91,

This is a really difficult situation and I really feel for you.

You said something about the situation is pressing your alarm bells; that it doesn’t feel like other times when your son has exaggerated in the past. Trust your mum instincts. From what you have said, it sounds as if something about this taxi driver has not sat entirely comfortably with you and has been nudging at you for a while, even prior to this event.  This instinctual unease you have had for some time about her is enough, (for me) to have requested a different driver, and at the very least, for you to do so now.

I think you have to tread gently, continue to be open minded, just as you are being, trust your son, continue to give him the benefit of the doubt, while remaining open hearted to being proved wrong, if needs be.  As, it is other people’s jobs, like the taxi drivers employers, your schools Safeguarding Officer, to consider all sides of the situation and to support you in taking this situation further if needs be.  It is not your responsibility alone to prove (or disprove) the facts of this incident; it is your job, however, to trust your son, trust your loving mum instincts and seek to protect your cub, just as you have been doing.

The taxi driver must have to follow some sort of procedure regarding this event, such as filling out an accident or incident report. Which you (and the school) have a right to request a copy of. I would make sure there is some sort of ‘official’ paper trail of this event, completing a Safeguarding Form through your school would be an excellent place to start, sometimes these forms are simply filed as, through the process of completing them, no risk has been found, but sometimes these forms go to the LA if a potential risk has been found. Your schools Safeguarding Officer will know about all this process and will complete this form with you. If school don’t want to complete one of these forms about this incident, ask them why they don’t. I sincerely believe you and the school must complete a Safeguarding form about this.

Maybe a concern letter to your Local Authority (cc in the firm) who contract out the school runs to the taxi firms too. Realistically, very little may come from this event for you or your son, (unless you decide to press charges with the police) but, if a similar event were to ever happen again in the future with this same taxi driver, that is when your paperwork may prove most useful in helping to protect other young people.

If you do write to anyone about it, be very careful NOT to directly accuse the taxi driver in any way, but to simply frame your letter as a (fair and reasonable) concern from a parent, that your son said or seemed to think A, B, C.. happened; that you spoke to the Safeguarding Officer at school, (and completed a safeguarding form with school) that you and the school decided not to take it further because, or you decided to take it further because; that type of thing. You see, the LA may have had other complaints about this firm or driver, you never know.

Remember it’s not your responsibility to prove the taxi driver guilty or not guilty, and it’s okay and appropriate to be a concerned and loving mum. Definitely request a different driver immediately though, in support of your son, don't make him take a taxi with this individual ever again, for his safety and for hers. And let the 'official' Safeguarding channels in your sons school take care of this process for you, that is exactly why they are there.

Best of luck.