Hi, i feel this may be a long post!
My partner and I have been having difficulties with our son since he was 2/3 yrs old. At that age health visitors used to visit us at home at our request to offer behavioural support. Our son is now nearly 9. I am a teacher at the school that he attends. Over the years we have seen the GP several times, visited CAMHs a number of times and he's had 2 paediatric referrals, one recently, and one 2 years ago. The CAMHs team felt he showed signs of ASD and ADHD. As i work at the school i suppose i'm aware of goings on behind the scenes. Unfortunately we have been severely lacking in SENCo support and the newly appointed SENCo is not trained but has worked at the school previously as a deputy head, she knows me well. He has always been behind academically but this year has been really telling, he is really struggling in maths with simple additions such as 6 + 2. The school agreed to give him adult support but this didn't happen. In his most recent school report i feel his progress has been inflated. He has always been very physical, im only 5ft and he's the same size as me. He is very violent and rough and impulsive. He hurts his 1 year old little sister. Mostly seems intentional to whom it is, and can be that he tries to hug someone so hard it hurts them. He has been wetting himself during the day and becoming more and more angry. His dad is a chef so works quite long hors and isn't at home an awful lot. Family occasions are very difficult, people get very cross with him and he will boil over. He won't wait his turn to speak and will scream over other people that are talking. The PD said he showed some traits of ASD but probably not enough for a diagnosis. I literally don't know where to turn next. I cry everyday because i find him so hard to manage everyday is a constant struggle with him. Most recent discussion with school is that the SENCo was going to meet with an ED Pysch to discuss him and decide what would be the most appropriate plan. At school he is more contained, he can be rough at playtimes. No one seems to notice if he wets himself. He has a very tricky year group with a host of behavioural problems and many children attending the PRU, i feel he is seen as the tip of the ice berg. As he is becoming older, i am getting more concerned. He makes noises constantly, lashes out, screams and will walk up to random children in shops and ask if they will be his friend. He then tells me this person is his best friend. I know all of this is a long process, i just don't know what to do next and need some strategies because at the moment nothing is helping him. I would greatly appreciate any advice.