I failed university after very little autistic support is there anything I can do?

This is very difficult for me to explain both because of my diagnosis and how painful it still feels even three years later.
It was my first time ever away from home and I made sure to contact my university and college about my diagnosis and problems I might face.
I heard nothing from the disability support at all and only received an email from my college to say that I’d not have to share a room.
The whole college experience was horrendous:
 
My room was in one of the busiest and most noisy parts of the whole college there was constant noise surrounding me I couldn’t sleep, I was stressed all the time. The college did nothing to help I kept asking them to stop the person above me jumping on her floor and partying all night and the college would keep promising to do so but never did. Then there was the extreme anxiety when people would knock on my door asking for donations or to sign up to certain things.
 
I never made any friends and some people found it very funny to torment me it made leaving my room and going to meals even harder than it was already. I do struggle with some issues with food and having to eat in a canteen with hundreds of other people made me constantly physically and mentally sick. It was made worse by the college occasionally allowing societies and groups to do events and gimmicks at meal time like a week when you could pay to have someone soaked with water balloons or super soakers or when societies would run in screaming, making noise and becoming physically close.
 
It was such a horrible time I struggled to leave my room in case I’d be bullied or become anxious but even in my room, I felt so lonely and uneasy with the noise and people knocking on my door. I barely slept and ate and felt extremely stressed the entire time.  I did speak to the college about the situation but they told me it was too late to change rooms and they kept saying they’d make the person above me quiet but it never changed anything.
 
As for the course I, really do love my subject but I found the way they did was very hard for me. We’d have small group exercises in which I’d always be put on the spot or made fun of by the other students. It made me so anxious I wasn’t always able to go. Additionally, there just wasn’t the support from the disabled support at the university they kept moving and the one contact I had there stopped answering my emails and when, after two months, I built up the courage to call the office and ask what was going on I was told she left out of the blue.  Then there were the note takers I found that all the notes were extremely badly done and when the office agreed they were illegible they typed them up but these were just as bad so it meant I was without notes for my classes.
 
So, after just about passing my first year after the bullying, academic and college struggles. I was severely underweight, sickly and had started anti-depressants. I should have given up there and then but I felt like I’d be letting down my parents not to continue my degree even though they were concerned with how sick I looked on my return. 
I ended up repeating my second year and so after three years I just couldn’t take it anymore and I quit. I was so ashamed that I couldn’t do it because I liked the subject but the other issues were just insurmountable to me. So, I left with huge amounts of student debt, in a deep depression that I am only now just about beating and the feeling of having wasted my life.
 
I know that the university is not responsible for how I reacted to university life or my autism but they failed to provide me any support at all. Do I have any rights to ask them to pay me back at least some of my fees or to ask for an explanation or even an apology?
 
Thank you for reading
  • Hello Helpwithuni,

    I'm so sorry to hear you had this horrible experience.  Your post really struck a chord with me because I also had a rotten time as an undergraduate.  That was nearly 20 years ago though and I wasn’t diagnosed at the time so my uni couldn't have been expected to do much to support me.  I now work in higher education and many universities do provide good support so it's disappointing that you were let down in this way.

    In terms of whether to pursue some kind of claim against the institution you attended, I'm not qualified to say what the likelihood of success of this might be.  (The links provided by Nellie-Mod can point you to an appropriate professional who can advise you on this). 

    Of course only you can decide if that is the right path to go down but the advice I would give is to think really carefully about what you would want to get out of the process.  A university is not going to quickly and easily admit that they failed to support a student who had disclosed a disability so even if the ultimate outcome was in your favour, you are likely to end up in a long drawn out process, having to go back over the details of what happened - this kind of process can be very stressful and might not do your health any good as you are recovering from depression.  Also, how would you feel if the ultimate outcome was not in your favour?

    You have been treated badly and it's natural to want to an apology and compensation for this and also to prevent other people going through the same experience but you also need to think about what is the right thing for you now and whether this would be the best use of your time.  That absolutely doesn't mean accepting that what happened was ok - it wasn't - it's more about not letting that experience take up any more of your time. 

    When I was younger I had a tendency to make formal complaints about all sorts of things - big and small!  I felt that to not do so was "letting them win" but over time I realised that actually I was the one losing by allowing the negative experiences, and the negative feelings associated with them, to keep on occupying my time.  Even when something really unfair has happened, sometimes it can be best to just let it go and channel all your energy into building your future instead.

    I really hope that this helps you - good luck with whatever you decide to do. 

    Best,

    londonlibrarian