managing consistency and routine in a separated family

hi i am new to the group although i have been a member of the autist society for a year or so.

my son is awaiting diagnoise. my husband and i separated 6 yrs ago and i am having great difficulty getting him to acknowledge my sons needs - social and emotional, violent behavoiur etc.

i also have an older child who has no problems with school and behaviour.

i have recently had to re apply to the courts to reduce contact as dad is not helping situation and supporting my son and me with his disability. he has a SEN and health care plan in place, my son needs structure and consistency which dad is not providing.

how do other families manage this?

thanks

  • I have the same problem. My sons Dad has weekly contact but he don't get my sons condition & often tells him off & causes unnessisary issues over things that are not my sons fault. His dad is selfish & will causes arguments for example because my son touches his car radio & nobody messes with his radio (grow up!) I feel my son is on edge around his Dad so his behaviour is worse & everything from the school runs to playing etc.. is 10 times harder & a nightmare for all!!! I don't have any answers I don't know what to do to make him understand our sons condition & get on the same page with routines etc... (he just says I should stop giving in to him all the time) other then stopping contact but I don't think that's possible.

  • I have the same problem. My sons Dad has weekly contact but he don't get my sons condition & often tells him off & causes unnessisary issues over things that are not my sons fault. His dad is selfish & will causes arguments for example because my son touches his car radio & nobody messes with his radio (grow up!) I feel my son is on edge around his Dad so his behaviour is worse & everything from the school runs to playing etc.. is 10 times harder & a nightmare for all!!!

    I don't have any answers

  • My son and daughter are bith on the spectrum (as am I) and the courts did not allow him to know our whereabouts or have any contact because of his behavior, so hugs. I can tell you that it was so hard without a father figure.