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I can't get my 7 year old son to leave the house

Rachael50

Would love some advice on the following. I am a single mum of a u a yr old boy with autism.  At the start of the school year he was doing lots of clubs and I was working part time.   Then after Easter his Teaching Assistant went off sick.  He didn't bond well with the temporary replacement.  He became aggressive towards a child who wouldn't play with him .  He slowly dropped out of all his weekend and after school clubs and now refuses to leave the house.  I'm being driven insane  because I have to sit indoors all day every day now that the holiday has started.   My son is on the computer all day and seems quite happy to do that.   I can't carry on like this though.  If I force him to go outside he will be very aggressive towards me and will refuse to move.  What should I do?

  • Hi, we are just going through the process of having our 13 yr old son diagnosed with possible autism/ aspergers (as well as depression) after a family bereavement - this is a whole new learning curve for us. He has refused to go to school for 5 weeks before the summer hols and is currently on screens more or less all day and almost never goes out apart from to a church youth group where he has two friends (he doesn't go if they are not there) We are walking on egg shells to avoid aggressive and destructive meltdowns and to keep stress levels down- but this means he is more or less doing what he likes. I have no idea how we will get him back into school in September. We have only just had our fist appointment with CAMHs and husband is not convinced - but now I can see the traits have always been there - fussy eating, routines etc we just thought they were all separate issues - but I can now see how they are all connected. Any advice much appreciated. We have a long waiting list for talking therapy and proper diagnosis/support.

  • encourage him to earn being able to play on the computer. Negiotiate this with him ???

  • Thank you agsin.  I will try and get him out the door tomorrow and into ny car asap before he wakes up the whole street 

  • My son was extremely aggressive when i made him go out at that age, now at 12 he is no longer physical with me but still lets the whole world know how unfair i'am making him go out! And the stares for me have not become any less uncomfortable, i just do my best to try not stare back! Yes, alot of people may think you have a brat of a child but just as many will realise there are underlying issues, something that has helped me a little. Best wishes, let me know how you both get on.

  • Thank you so much for that.  I do get embarrassed by what the neighbours think.  But you are right  for the sake of his and my sanity we must get out  im just so tired if the rows.

  • I have a 12yr old son who is Asperger's and i know exactly how your situation feels! For your own sanity you have to get you and your son out of the house every day even if only for literally 5 minutes! My son strongly protests to put it mildly but just being outside with him, even when he refuses to walk, makes me feel like i have achieved a small triumph, do your best to ignore any stares should your son start to protest loudly and do not give in as from my experience he may well use this to his advantage next time and you may give in before you both get out the door! Chin up, you are not alone in this!