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9 year old who is developing. Is this behaviour normal

Sylv1959

Hi

My granddaughter is autistic and is already starting to develop physically at the age of 9.  She has ongoing problems in main streem school with what the school call, bad behaviour.  She can be aggressive and refuse to complete work and has recently showed her underwear to the other children, which she thought was funny. She is disruptive and has social problems with other children.  I know some of these behaviours are due to her autism, but not sure if the undreware issue is and her refusal to engage in school work.  We are looking towards applying for the EHC, but apparently we have to give the school a chance to complete a care plan and to be seen to have done everything they can.  What other behaviours should we expect due to her hormonal changes?  The school is convinced that she is just a very naughty child.  Can anyone give me any advice please as we don't know how to recognise if it's bad behaviour or autistic behaviour.

Thanks

  • Autistic behaviour, though often represented that way, is not a clinical set of conditions down directly to being autistic.

    A key factor is lack of social referencing - not being able to interact socially due to eye contact, reading and generating facial expression and body language, and following conversation (especially in noisy environments).

    So she will not get the feedback most kids get about what is acceptable and not acceptable. Her attempts to understand social interchange will be clumsy and often wrong, and her frustration with these difficulties may show as disruptive and aggressive behaviour.

    Some people (sadly including schools that should know better) treat these difficulties as bad behaviour, and not being 'normal' - but how does a child comprehend normal if mostly isolated from normal social interaction?

    Also, because it is difficult to pick up general behavioural information that most kids get from social referencing, she may rely on others for the right advice. There could be various reasons why she raises her dress and shows her underwear, one in particular is someone, one of her peers, or an adult she trusts, is telling her to do it, for the amusement that she cannot tell properly that it is wrong.

    It is immensely sad howe few people understand the autism dilemma. You cannot socially interact successfully. You are more likely to be excluded or made fun of.

    It is not that different from being blind or deaf. Yes she can see and hear, but she is having trouble receiving, processing and using this information. The same care given to deaf or blind children ought to be given to autistic kids - but no, what we see is doubt and bizarre assertions it is deliberate or as here "developing physically"????

    You need to read up on it to understand it.