My daughters High functioning autism is holding her back from attending college. Learning support have been brilliant and very patient, but despite everyone's efforts she still struggles with attending even tjough she wants to.
How do i keep her motivated to get her back into the swing of going.
This is a difficult one. It depends on the individual and what happened to them at school. I assume it is 6th form or otherwise within secondary, rather than further education - when people say college these days it usually seems to mean for extension of school studies.
The two environments differ in that FE college will be much more independent in structure and much less intervention. Some FE colleges have good disability support infrastructures, some don't - I'm not clear what goes on in the 6th form type, probably a lot less.
We are all affected in different ways by autism, different degrees of different parameters, so it is hard to generalise. And personality plays a part, as does levels of confidence and self esteem.
It is probably true some of the time that a college is more liberating, less interventionist with less peer-pressure. There is less likely to be bullying. You don't usually have to explain why you are where you are rather than in class. You therefore have more freedom to find safe space and avoid conflict areas. So sometimes that kind of environment is really beneficial to someone on the spectrum. But, for some people it doesn't run smoothly at all, and it can be quite destructive.
Loss of structure could be a factor. Schools do tend to expect you to be somewhere you are timetabled to be, and people move around in cohorts that you can identify with (even if they are not friendly). A college environment means you have to know where you are meant to be when, and there is less likely to be anyone chasing you for not being there. So a timetable that covers not only studies but other activities might help.
A mentor would also be useful - someone sympathetic and understanding who can just make sure she goes where she should, and has explanations, would help. Not necessarily easy to set up. Key workers have been mentioned, there might be a note-taker provided - but not everyone wants to have a visible "hand holder".
School may not be great fun for people on the spectrum, but it sort of cares for you, in a way that colleges just don't. So a college can be a really strange place. It can be quite hard to find rooms where classes take place. The kinds of rooms used for teaching can be very different, and smell different (eg laboratories), and have very different lighting, and can be noisy at times, or crowded. A lecture room, if well filled, can mean close proximity to others, being in the middle of a sensory world without means of escape. Often much harder to leave if distressed if everyone has to shift to let you pass.
So a map may help, and some assistance over where to sit, or how to best deal with some room types.
Eating facilities can be very noisy. School lunch is usually ordered and eaten with a modicum of noise under supervision. College canteens are usually crowded, with loud background music, people milling everywhere, people lounging, messing around, arguing, shouting - really hard to engage with if your sensory world isn't well adapted. I don't know what it is about student eating habits - it just seems to revel in overcrowded, noisy, jarring environments. The problem is - where do you sit... if you're a loner? But there may be alternatives, and maybe taking sandwiches and finding somewhere quiet is an option.
My advice, if she is willing, is to talk to her about what college is like. What parts of it present difficulties. From what you know about what she finds hard, are any of these things putting he off going.
The change from school to college is not automatically easy for someone on the spectrum, and there may be things you wouldn't give a thought to that are putting her off going.
If she passes the course she is on then she may well be able to take that further.
If she doesn't pass the course she is on then she either repeat if they let her and she become bored as she will have done lots and just simply holding herself back.
Between you and your daughter work out her long term goal of achieving this course. Remind her of her progress each time. The things she enjoys about going to college. It not just about the studies but any social life she may have there. If she hasn't any there then use that as time to perhaps join a club if the college has anything going that might interest her. That might help motivate her on the times she finds it harder to go in.
Hope this helps a little - I know what it is like not wanting to actually go but wanting to do so.... Perhaps there is something missing there which a really good team of people around you are helping but not quite that something to get you there when need that boost.
Is it the transport that is the 'worry'. Getting there and back. It could be something so tiny to everyday perception of things but to us it can really stop us doing soemthing.
If she hasn't already got one, see if learning support can assign your daughter a Key worker.
A Key worker, ideally, should be someone at College she trusts to go to with any anxieties she has and someone who is also Aspie aware so they can support her more intensively. Having an assigned person you can e-mail with concerns or she can go to will help with confidence and reassurance as well as keep her focused on small areas, rather than her looking at the bigger picture and becoming overwhelmed.
Keep in mind that attending college is a huge step for Aspies and intergration can take much longer than most NT's.
Talk also to the Learning support team and ask if they can set up a 'V Inspire' account for her. 'V inspire' allows you to register hours of voluntary work to a database and aquire points as a result. It can be as small as helping a neighbour or a fellow student at College or working with others in her free time in a hobby etc.
This can help build confidence and gives the student a sense of value beyond the academic studies and classroom that they can transfer to achievement academically. V inspire can then be used to add to personal statements when applying for UNI or other Colleges and courses or for CV's etc and showcases a students activities beyond the classroom. A great carrot to dangle for attendence and something to help with motivation.
My own son has collected his voluntary hours supporting other Aspie students at College, as well as participating in staff training by explaing to teachers what his needs are and theirfore raising Autism awareness. He's also participated in voluntary events with his local Autism hub. It doesnt have to be full time, just one off things are fine. She may not feel able to do as my son has, but like I say, it links home and College.
Hope that helps
Good luck
Coogy
