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Son with ASD with social anxiety and severe depression in his late twenties never goes out

Angelequilting

My son is in his late twenties and lives in a flat we own and pay all the bills for. I just don't know if I should try and intervine after months in his bedroom in his flat, not really leaving it, he is fiercely private, can self medicate with alcohol and I just don't know which way to turn. I find talking about it breaks my heart, and when anything aspergers is spoken about publicly I brim up with tears and grief. Mostly we cope on a day to day basis, but I am getting tired and overwhelmed and just wonder if others have this sort of thing and how do they approach it? He can be quite verbally confrontational, and difficult to stop once he starts. He is very bright.

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  • Former Member
    Former Member

    I was quoting the consultant psychiatrist who diagnosed me. He is entirely mainstream and not a quack.

    I don't think I suggested that anything would be easy or anything about the ultimate destination. I was trying to suggest that the direction of travel could be reversed and that his fate is not sealed and that he is not condemned to a life of social anxiety and depression. Social anxiety and depression are not part of autism, they are the products of the social failures and social isolation that frequently follow in an autistic life that has gone off the rails.

    Longman, you go out every day because you chose to do that. You are not destined to do so. You make that choice. The subject of this thread is making a different choice because he believes that he cannot do otherwise. He has had enough bad experience with dealing with the world that that choice makes most sense to him at this point. Persuading him that the balance can be tipped will not be easy but NHS professionals should be able to achieve that.

    People do emerge from this hermit/reclusive state, the autism is permanent but the consequential morbidity does not have to be.

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  • Former Member
    Former Member

    I was quoting the consultant psychiatrist who diagnosed me. He is entirely mainstream and not a quack.

    I don't think I suggested that anything would be easy or anything about the ultimate destination. I was trying to suggest that the direction of travel could be reversed and that his fate is not sealed and that he is not condemned to a life of social anxiety and depression. Social anxiety and depression are not part of autism, they are the products of the social failures and social isolation that frequently follow in an autistic life that has gone off the rails.

    Longman, you go out every day because you chose to do that. You are not destined to do so. You make that choice. The subject of this thread is making a different choice because he believes that he cannot do otherwise. He has had enough bad experience with dealing with the world that that choice makes most sense to him at this point. Persuading him that the balance can be tipped will not be easy but NHS professionals should be able to achieve that.

    People do emerge from this hermit/reclusive state, the autism is permanent but the consequential morbidity does not have to be.

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