To home school or not???

Has the school encouraged any form of social skills development. Stress will prevent your son from being able to focus on his work. Sometimes having a peer to relieve some tension can help. Also ample opportunity for down time.

Does he have an IEP?

I work with a young man,aged 9, since the beginning of this year. The former worker said he needs growled at to get anything done, you have to be hard on him and he will never be toilet trained. I had him toilet trained fully within a term and completely changed how he approached learning. He was only doing dot to dots for maths, his focus was on learning numbers. When he relaxed and I had encouraged social skills and friendships to start forming, he cpletely changed. He showed he could count forwards and backwards extremely well and understood addition and subtraction. We introduced him to fractions, time, algebra and geometry and he began picking things up quickly. 

For writing I applied for him to get a funded assistive technology Chromebook and also got him headphones to limit noise distraction. His writing went from 4 words in a session to 20 simple sentences. 

I'm trying to put together a book with worksheets and ideas for teaching kids with autism. Can I ask what you think work be helpful for the school to understand?

Can you ask the school what they are doing to support the needs of your child? Most schools should be heading towards inclusion and that means they need to work within the capabilities of a child and extend on them. Ask for an IEP if he doesn't have one already and press for acknowledgment of the barriers inhis education.

Thanks Mum170,

This gives me some hope.  The school are going to start a request for a statement as they have been trying to accomodate him by reducing his timetable and allowing him to come in at 9am instead of 8:40am.  The difficulty is my son finds it very difficult to motivate himself, even when he knows he has to do something.  We are also looking into a referral and diagnosis of PDA which my GP is offering to refer him to Nottingham for.

My son is very capable of achieving and the school are being quite supportive but my local authority refuses to do statements and the school receives no extra funding to support him in the way they would like to.

Thank you all for your helpful responses!

Thank you so much mum170 for your good advice!  Reading your comment, my son also struggles when addressed by someone he doesnt know well, particularly in authority.  Recently the boys in his class were pulled before the head teacher after school as some of them had been throwing wet tissue paper on the ceiling in the boys toilets... my son was absolutely distraugh when he came out that day.  He was insistant that he hadn't done it but took it like he was being personally blamed for what had happened.  He just didnt understand that the teacher was not blaming anyone in particular and had to speak to the boys as a group!

We have also had teachers (in front of me I might add) talking to Calvin and demanding that he 'LOOK AT THEM' while they talk to him.  They dont understand that he can't!

He has excused himself from PE on many occasions, but thankfully his class teacher has been so understanding.  Its just his other teachers such as the English and science ones that dont seem to make any allowance for his autism.  I had a real fight on my hands just to stop them pushing him to write joined up!!

After seeing the SenCo, she interveined on our behalf which helped tremendously.  She has also put his name down for a tap typing course that should start beginning of year 5 (after the summer hols).

Bob, I completely get what you are staying... My son is finding each year of school worse than the one before... and he too has had issues with children being down right nasty with him.  He just doesnt have the tools in his box to know how to deal with it.  Most days he begs me to home school him!  Its so hard to know what to do for the best.  When he breaks up for the weekend or school holidays, he is like a different child... the relief completely un-crumples his little face and you can see his entire body language change.

Thank you also Blossom59... there is a very good 'special needs' school near us, but I don't know whether I would be able to get him in because he hasn't got a statement.  I don't know why he was never given one and now they are changing the statementing system I have been told not to apply yet as nothing will happen because of the transition between old and new statements.  I'm going to have to look into this better.

Thank you for all your help everyone! 

The school has a responsibilty to provide appropriate education for your son. This might mean using a computer, breaking work into manageable chunks, allowing extra time. Ask for a meeting at school to discuss the issue and take someone with you who understands disabilty rights. Usually using the phrase 'making reasonable adjustments' sends them rushing to accomodate you!

My son was in mainstream school but all through high school, teachers were asked not to ask him questions directly in front of the class, for school management, eg deputies/year heads never to talk to him directly, but to go through the school support office, if there was an issue. He would panic if directly addressed by someone he didn't know well. He was excused from after school activities, some P.E. classes, and lunchtime sessions, as he needed lots of time out to get through the day. He used a computer for work/ exams, was exempt from some subjects, like French and any homework that caused undue stress was excused. 

He has just left with 5 grade A scottish highers. He would not have managed this without the cooperation of the school. Insist on his rights. Childre with autism can do very well with the right support.

Hi,

My 13 year old son is feeling the same way in year 8.  He is refusing to go to school now and I don't know what to do.  I work full time and my job is increasing in pressure all the time and I'm finding it hard to cope with it all.  I'm considering changing jobs but I don't know if there is anything more suitable out there.  Help!

Bob,

It sounds to me as though your daughter needs counselling with the aim of gaining strategies for ignoring and dealing with the mean kids. It sounds as though she is on a slippery slope that may get worse. It also sounds as though the school are not actually resolving the bullying that is taking place.

I would have thought counselling might come from camhs rather than SLT people. Perhaps a bit of both may be even better?

Hi Geewhiz1999.

I know EXACTLY how you are feeling. We kept our grandson, who has high functioning ASD in the mainstream school until he was 10. The school he attended was award winning and achieved fantastic academic results if the child had no problems. Unfortunately although the school were more than happy to take ASD children because of the extra financial and teaching assistant support it meant they were fundamentally uninformed about ASD. I would pick our little lad up from school to be told he's been awful today....its not his autism...he was just naughty! As if he could take the condition that informs his every action and thought off like an old coat when he wanted to. I did consider home schooling but didn't think that I could guarantee being able to keep it up as he got into his teenage years as he is academically bright.

You don't mention if there are any additional needs schools in your area which would be worth looking at. I was really frightened at the thought of a special school but there is an award winning school in our area and the decision to send him there was the best thing we ever did for him. He is now in a place where his challenges are understood and is a much much happier (14 now). His education has continued at the same level...but he is in a small class with staff who understand how to allow him to access the curriculum. I remember in the mainstream school that he was made to sit a listening comprehension test in a room with the windows open near a road and a digger working outside!! Needless to say he couldnt do it.

This comes up on the forum from time to time

community.autism.org.uk/.../"home school"

I would be cautious as there are good mainstream schools that do understand the condition and you may be better off moving him to a school that does get it.