• Replies 3 replies
  • Subscribers 65 subscribers
  • Views 596 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

starting on the journey

bertieh

Hello

My 8 year old son has just received a diagnosis of ASD and it has come as a relief to be honest, as we have always known that he needed a little more help to understand the world around him.  We haven't talked about the diagnosis explicitly with him yet as I have been advised to make sure that we have some other support mechanisms in place first, such as the school calling in the ASD service - however, he is of course aware that he has been for assessments and that there are lots of people trying to help him.  We are in that limbo period of having a diagnosis and us, as parents, finding out what help and advice is available and where and how to access it.

I am sure that  all this has sparked some extra anxiety in him, as his behaviour has become more unpredictable and difficult to manage over the past few weeks.  He is responding more severely to sensory issues and talking (again, unfortunately) about wanting to kill himself, and now even wanting to kill me.  I know - i hope -  he doesn't mean these things -  the killing me part is his way of expressing how frustrated he is feeling  - but I am not sure how to help him. He has talked about suicide before and has a plan - CAMHS are aware but don't think there is a mental health issue.  For example, some of his frustrations today are that  he is upset because I have to go to work tomorrow on what might be the hottest day of the year, that the hairdryer was too hot, that he can't whistle.  He has started trying to run off across the road as well, and hitting me in public - and it's difficult to know what to do in that moment when I have another young son to look after too.  I try to remain calm but it's not always easy. 

 I know these are all expressions of his frustrations - but I am struggling with knowing what to do to help him through these bad times and also to know what to do to just manage.  I know he'll be worried about starting back at school after the easter break too.  I just want to do the right thing to help him.

thanks - sorry, just needed to get it all out!  I know that hopefully we will be able to access some help and guidance soon, but it's all still bewildering.

  

Parents

  • Hi bertieh,

    I was so pleased to receive your message...I have been thinking about you and your little boy. No need to thank me. Welcome to the ASD community...all we parents can do is look around at the different bits of experience and advice that other people in the same situation have and try things out. Its good to chat on a site like this as its so easy to become isolated by autism...and that's not just the child with the condition but the family as well.

    I remember when our grandson was small that he was having trouble piddling where he was supposed to. Somebody told me that putting a ping pong ball in the loo would give him a target to aim at and an incentive. It worked alright...he would aim straight at the ball....unfortunately he would then pick it out of the loo and throw it down the stairs dripping haaaaaaa. It was back to the drawing board after that!

Reply

  • Hi bertieh,

    I was so pleased to receive your message...I have been thinking about you and your little boy. No need to thank me. Welcome to the ASD community...all we parents can do is look around at the different bits of experience and advice that other people in the same situation have and try things out. Its good to chat on a site like this as its so easy to become isolated by autism...and that's not just the child with the condition but the family as well.

    I remember when our grandson was small that he was having trouble piddling where he was supposed to. Somebody told me that putting a ping pong ball in the loo would give him a target to aim at and an incentive. It worked alright...he would aim straight at the ball....unfortunately he would then pick it out of the loo and throw it down the stairs dripping haaaaaaa. It was back to the drawing board after that!

Children
No Data