Undiagnosed 6-yr-old, mother at end of tether!

Hi,

I would like some advice/help/sympathy!

I have a 6-yr-old boy who has anger issues and can be really defiant. He hurts other kids at school and was excluded for a day and a half the other week. I had a "Choices" interview with Camhs in April, but we have been on a waiting list since then, without being seen. His headmistress thinks he has Attachment Disorder, and he certainly seems to tick most of the boxes, but I am finding it hard to know how to deal with him. I am trying to set clear boundaries, but he doesn't seem to learn - the behaviour doesn't change. Instead, he resents me for punishing him.

I get really upset when we go out and he refuses to do as he's told - it makes me feel like an idiot for not being able to control a 6-yr-old! I feel like no-one wants us around and I can't take him anywhere without being really worried about his behaviour. We are due to go to Brighton this weekend, to visit friends, and I am just dreading him hurting their child, and running off or being wilfully disobedient in public. 

Any advice gratefully accepted...

Parents
  • Not really sure which avenue you have gone down so sorry if you have already done this but, try going to your GP and asking for a referal to the peditrician, in my experience their waiting lists are far shorter and they might be able to give you some idea of what you are actually dealing with, with your son.

    Secondly, you say punishing him. Have you tried simply removing him from the situation and not rewarding him with cominication when he does something wrong, and positive reinforcement for every little thing regardless of how little he does right? Therefore he seeks appropriate attention.

Reply
  • Not really sure which avenue you have gone down so sorry if you have already done this but, try going to your GP and asking for a referal to the peditrician, in my experience their waiting lists are far shorter and they might be able to give you some idea of what you are actually dealing with, with your son.

    Secondly, you say punishing him. Have you tried simply removing him from the situation and not rewarding him with cominication when he does something wrong, and positive reinforcement for every little thing regardless of how little he does right? Therefore he seeks appropriate attention.

Children
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