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I need help to get help

Zsuzsanna77

Hi,

My child needs help but it looks like noone can help or point us to somewhere else.

He needs some medical tests like blood pressure, blood test and ECG. However, he hasn't left the house in 10 months. He does not go to school, he just got offered a place for online tutoring. The kid doesn't even have shoes because he grown out of them and we never needed new ones. 

The GP just keeps telling me that I need to take him in then I say, I cannot. He just can't to it and he's not a toddler so I can just pick him up and take him (what I wouldn't do anyway), he's 14. If we just talk about going out he gets upset that often leads to him hurting himself. So no, I cannot take him to GP but they say his circumstances does not qualify him for someone to come out and do the tests here at home. I called 111, they can't help. 

At the moment they gave me a week to get him in, if we don't go we talk again.... 

Can someone give me an idea where to go from here? Where to call, write, turn to? I can't believe he's the only one in this situation....

Thank You!

Parents

  • Hi ,

    Thank you for sharing what you and your son are going through. I'm so sorry to hear how difficult things have become for both of you. It sounds as though you have been trying incredibly hard to get support for your son, and it must be exhausting and upsetting to keep reaching barriers when you're simply seeking the help he needs.

    Our community members may have been through something similar and may be able to share what helped them access support. You're certainly not alone in facing difficulties, even though it may feel that way right now.

    Some practical options are:

    • Calling the medical practice and asking to speak with a different GP to discuss your concerns.
    • Requesting a conversation with the Practice Manager to explore whether any alternative arrangements or community-based services may be available.
    • If your son is currently under the care of any mental health, paediatric, or neurodevelopmental services, contacting them directly to explain the difficulties he is experiencing with attending appointments.
    • Considering making a complaint to the NHS if you feel your concerns are not being adequately addressed. You may find support from the Patient Advice and Liaison Service (PALS), which provides confidential advice and information about NHS services: What is PALS?
    • Contacting social work to request a social care assessment for your son, as well as a Carer's Assessment for yourself. You can find more information here: Social care and autism
    • It sounds like your son is having input from school role.  You could request they convene a multi-disciplinary team to look at his mental health and medical issues alongside his school attendance.
    • Reading more about support around self-harm on our website: Self-harm

    I hope some of this information is helpful, and that you and your son are able to access the support you both need.

    Take Care

    Suzanne Mod

Reply

  • Hi ,

    Thank you for sharing what you and your son are going through. I'm so sorry to hear how difficult things have become for both of you. It sounds as though you have been trying incredibly hard to get support for your son, and it must be exhausting and upsetting to keep reaching barriers when you're simply seeking the help he needs.

    Our community members may have been through something similar and may be able to share what helped them access support. You're certainly not alone in facing difficulties, even though it may feel that way right now.

    Some practical options are:

    • Calling the medical practice and asking to speak with a different GP to discuss your concerns.
    • Requesting a conversation with the Practice Manager to explore whether any alternative arrangements or community-based services may be available.
    • If your son is currently under the care of any mental health, paediatric, or neurodevelopmental services, contacting them directly to explain the difficulties he is experiencing with attending appointments.
    • Considering making a complaint to the NHS if you feel your concerns are not being adequately addressed. You may find support from the Patient Advice and Liaison Service (PALS), which provides confidential advice and information about NHS services: What is PALS?
    • Contacting social work to request a social care assessment for your son, as well as a Carer's Assessment for yourself. You can find more information here: Social care and autism
    • It sounds like your son is having input from school role.  You could request they convene a multi-disciplinary team to look at his mental health and medical issues alongside his school attendance.
    • Reading more about support around self-harm on our website: Self-harm

    I hope some of this information is helpful, and that you and your son are able to access the support you both need.

    Take Care

    Suzanne Mod

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