Should we be doing stuff or nothing

Hello all

I have posted on here before but I am finding it all really difficult. Our daughter is seven, she has SPD and ASD. She has been diagnosed for almost two years and the diagnosis' were given separately so do we treat them separately? We understand that our daughter comes as a whole and her diagnosis' make her who she is but do we get through each day treating her normally and allowing her to think things she does is ok? Do we do her spd therapy daily? How do we know when to do it?

I research information but I can't make it make sense.

Very confused mummy xxx

  • Former Member
    Former Member

    If she is keeping up in school then this is a good thing! A good teacher in a good school may be able to deal with this without special measures. The fact that she has a diagnosis doesn't necessarily mean that you have got a child that needs very special treatment.School can be a good place for children with ASD as there will be structure and predictability. If it is a well run school then the environment can be the best place for her. Her behaviour probably tells you that they are doing things correctly.

    She needs special consideration but she would probably benefit from being treated normally as far as possible and only think about special intervention if she is being especially challenging or hard to understand or manage. I would echo Coogy's plea for positive parenting. Children with ASD really don't react to sticks but are much better with carrots! Be consistent with your decisions, don't say one thing and then do something else as this will cause more and more problems.

  • Yeah that's what I mean hun. She has no iep or statement or ehc plan or support in school apart from what I have told them I am doing. They don't see she needs help in school as she is fine the whole day. I am currently waiting for referrals back to the OT and cahms but I feel like I am letting her down xxx 

  • Hi jrandall10,

      Can you define SPD as it has more than one meaning I believe. I'm assuming you mean Sensory Processing Disorder.

    If I've understood you correctly, I gather what you are asking is should you treat your daughter as though she is 'Normal.' I'm assuming you mean to treat her as you would treat a neurotypical child?

    I have two children on the spectrum who also have co-occuring specific learning difficulties and both are completely different. Over the years what has worked for one hasn't always worked for the other child, even when dealing with very similar disabilities.

    What I've always insisted on though, is to focus on the positive things that both children can do. Boosting moral and self-esteem is all about helping a child realize what they do well. In my own boys experience it's clear their severe dyslexia was always going to be an issue, but finding ways to overcome that barrier is about opening doors and enabling.

    As people we have many complex facets and if you have difficulties it pays to work on helping to overcome them all, how you go about that is entirely up to you, their are no rules. Does your daughter have a statement or EHC plan? is she getting support at School or from the local NHS services? Have you had advice about your child level of need?

    Remarkable things are possible with the right support. My son has gone from a School refuser and to a College student studying A Levels despite his disability. In approaching support of a child on the spectrum you must believe that anything is possible and hold onto the fact that the greater the support and intevention the child has when young, the greater the likelyhood that they will be able to attain.

    My advice would be to do everything you can! If not you may never know.

    I wish you all the luck..