Sleep problems

He goes to sleep ok even if it is while lying on me. He does struggle to stay asleep. He'll start moaning in his sleep a couple of hours after he's settled and then unless I'm next to him he'll be unsettled most of the night. He was in a toddler bed however through the Family Fund we've just got him a single bed which is the same height as ours so he's on the same level. I've even tried putting my cardigans or other items of clothing on him so he can at least smell me near by.

That's interesting. Even if you stay in his bed with him? I wonder whether it is an issue with his bed or his room or whether it's the fear that you won't be there by morning and therefore your bed feels safer. I am no expert but this doesn't sound like sleep is the main issue here. If it was just difficulty staying asleep then he would go down ok. 

He is definitely clingy with me. I do everything for him as my husband is unable to due to having ME and recently being diagnosed with fibromyalgia. We've tried getting him to fall asleep in his bed with his milk but unless he actually falls asleep he will just get out and climb on our bed. Or if I try and keep him in his bed he'll just get upset.

Have you tried gradually moving yourself away? So start off sleeping next to him then move to the side so he can still touch you but he's not actually on you, then to the floor of his room etc. Build up his confidence that he is safe whilst asleep slowly?

Another thing that can help sleep issues but I don't know whether it'd be recommended in a small child or whether it'd help in this situation as this sounds more like separation anxiety. But the advice I was given that helped me was to actually go to bed much later. To start with I would get enough sleep but I would likely sleep through to my alarm. Very gradually I then brought my bed time earlier and earlier so that eventually I would get enough sleep. This helped train my brain to stay asleep. I was an adult though so I don't know whether they advise this kind of thing for a 3 year old.

My son is 4 next month. This all started because he was sick 15 times in one night and we didn't want him lying flat in the cot. He prefers to chew his toys rather than cuddling them.

Never mind then.

Yeah it's very challenging. He spent over a year just sleeping on me in our bed. We've just got him a single bed but I still end up in there most nights with him.

I see. That possibly limits what changes can be made. I see you mentioned seeing your GP. They would be able to advise, we can only tell you of personal experience.

His bed is in our room as we live in a 2 bed flat and have a 10 year old as well. He falls asleep on me then I move him into his bed. We've tried to get him to fall asleep in his bed but he just gets distressed and starts crying. And yet if he comes on me he can be asleep within 5 minutes. We do keep the same routine every night and regardless of how much exercise he's had during the day he never seems to run out. 

Hi. Not sure where you are when he falls asleep. Personally if I fall asleep near bedtime I can't then sleep when I get to bed. I find quiet music helps me. It is all about finding something to switch the mind off concentrating on something other than not sleeping. I find it helps to keep to the same sort of time but sometimes it is harder to get to sleep if I am not very tired, so may wait half an hour rather than lying there longer.

My son has always had a lot of difficulty with sleep. Things that have helped are blackout curtains, cool cotton bedding and a fan on at night as the sound helps him fall asleep. He also had one of those clocks that had pictures that came on when time to get up. 

I wonder if making a few changes might help to change thought patterns of going to bed. 

When he was young it helped if he had a lot of exercise. I didn't have a car available, so we walked a lot and went places where he could run.