CBT

I don't have a recommendation, but I can give my opinion:

Looking up what it is throws up a couple of obvious problems just in the setup and framing.

How It Works:

• Identify: You learn to recognize automatic negative thoughts that influence your mood.
• Challenge: You challenge these irrational thoughts, recognizing them as faulty rather than facts.
• Change: You replace negative thoughts and behaviors with healthier, more functional patterns.

It can be done individually or on groups.

Any group based activity is going to be a problem because you are trying to fit in and will not speak openly. You will say what you think they want to hear, if you say anything at all. Unless the other people think like you, you are going to struggle to identify with what they going on about.

The problem is the initial premise that there are negative thoughts, or that they are irrational. They aren't.

The idea that changing your thoughts will calm you is the wrong way round. You are overthinking because you are trying to calm yourself. Stopping this is unhelpful.

The problem is this can  lead to thinking you need to squash your emotions and to mask better.

Most of the problems are due to fear of the unknown and lack of control. Not being able to control who the teacher will pick, means you don't know if it will be you, so you are constantly braced trying to plan an answer and decide what you will do. If you can't, it is fear. Not knowing what to expect in the lesson tomorrow leads to overthinking the various scenarios so you are not caught out. Struggling with interactions and having unexpected responses leads to replaying conversations looking for rules so you know what to say next time or what you did wrong. 

It is the set of rules you build that allows your nervous system to relax.

Trying not to think about things is the long term strategy as an adult, but this comes from safe exposure and learning what to expect. It is a consequence of the rules, not the objective on its own. Once you are sure you know what to expect in a given scenario and you have a set of responses and behaviours you have tried and proven to work, so there is no need to planning, no need to worry, you appear more confident and because you are relaxed it works better.

This takes time and consistency.

Since you are largely running on will power all the time to overcome things, being told to just think positively and go do more stuff is not very easy.

I suppose what you need is a mentor or trusted companion to provide help with specific scenarios, the help makes sense of things, to understand why things happened, whether it is important, and what to do in future. I e. someone to help you figure out the rules.

Being afraid of doing the wrong thing is what holds you back. You learn by doing the wrong things, the issue is to be able to try, not to be too sensitive (which requires calibration) and not be so scared.

I think an autistic teacher/therapist has a better intuitive grasp of this.

Note that this is from a male perspective, I don't know what it feels like as a girl. But while it may appear a bit differently on the outside, I don't think it it is too different. 

I don't have a recommendation, but I can give my opinion:

Looking up what it is throws up a couple of obvious problems just in the setup and framing.

How It Works:

• Identify: You learn to recognize automatic negative thoughts that influence your mood.
• Challenge: You challenge these irrational thoughts, recognizing them as faulty rather than facts.
• Change: You replace negative thoughts and behaviors with healthier, more functional patterns.

It can be done individually or on groups.

Any group based activity is going to be a problem because you are trying to fit in and will not speak openly. You will say what you think they want to hear, if you say anything at all. Unless the other people think like you, you are going to struggle to identify with what they going on about.

The problem is the initial premise that there are negative thoughts, or that they are irrational. They aren't.

The idea that changing your thoughts will calm you is the wrong way round. You are overthinking because you are trying to calm yourself. Stopping this is unhelpful.

The problem is this can  lead to thinking you need to squash your emotions and to mask better.

Most of the problems are due to fear of the unknown and lack of control. Not being able to control who the teacher will pick, means you don't know if it will be you, so you are constantly braced trying to plan an answer and decide what you will do. If you can't, it is fear. Not knowing what to expect in the lesson tomorrow leads to overthinking the various scenarios so you are not caught out. Struggling with interactions and having unexpected responses leads to replaying conversations looking for rules so you know what to say next time or what you did wrong. 

It is the set of rules you build that allows your nervous system to relax.

Trying not to think about things is the long term strategy as an adult, but this comes from safe exposure and learning what to expect. It is a consequence of the rules, not the objective on its own. Once you are sure you know what to expect in a given scenario and you have a set of responses and behaviours you have tried and proven to work, so there is no need to planning, no need to worry, you appear more confident and because you are relaxed it works better.

This takes time and consistency.

Since you are largely running on will power all the time to overcome things, being told to just think positively and go do more stuff is not very easy.

I suppose what you need is a mentor or trusted companion to provide help with specific scenarios, the help makes sense of things, to understand why things happened, whether it is important, and what to do in future. I e. someone to help you figure out the rules.

Being afraid of doing the wrong thing is what holds you back. You learn by doing the wrong things, the issue is to be able to try, not to be too sensitive (which requires calibration) and not be so scared.

I think an autistic teacher/therapist has a better intuitive grasp of this.

Note that this is from a male perspective, I don't know what it feels like as a girl. But while it may appear a bit differently on the outside, I don't think it it is too different.