Common about raising autistic adult?

Hi, I’m completely new here on NAS and I’m curious and hoping I can get an answer to my question.

My question is this: is it normal for a parent to put their adult autistic child in front of the TV or computer almost 24/7 just to protect themselves from their own child because the child might damage the house or harm other family members?

I’m having a hard time accepting this, because the autistic person is causing a lot of harm online, and the parent wants me — as someone who has been affected — to “grow a thicker skin.” The parent is aware that their child is harming others, especially many children, and that he has certain urges that don’t work in real life.

Parents
  • I think this sounds like a very difficult situation. Ideally the autistic person should have some other outlets and groups to prevent nearly all these negative aspects. And ideally they need to learn how to conduct themselves online as it isn't acceptable to behave in a detrimental way to others mental health either. 

    I am not always the best to suggest things, so hopefully you'll get some other input, but the best you could do is research some group ideas, print them off and give them to the parent. It's not really your job in this scenario, but if you are asking for help? It sounds like the parent my not be coping so be aware they might not take advice.

    That and look up ways to protect yourself from cyber bullying? There is a difference between forthright and causing harm to others, and if it escalates to harassment, can you report it on the media platform?

  • Hi, and thank you for your response.

    I shared my view that her son might benefit from some form of professional support, such as help from a psychologist or a similar professional. I, along with a few others who have been affected, have tried to explain that the situation is quite serious, as his behavior online goes against many social norms and, in some cases, the law. This includes inappropriate and harmful behavior toward children and women(sexually). He also expresses strong reactions to certain american words and has made statements that negative consequences could occur if people do not comply with his wishes.

    According to his mother, he also causes difficulties at home, and this is something she deals with on a daily basis. She has expressed that she believes others should also tolerate this behavior, as she feels he does not fully understand that what he is doing is wrong. She wants to accept and has chosen to accept the situation, as she has done for the past 30 years.

    I also want to add that I have reported him on several platforms. As a result, he has been suspended, but he keeps coming back using new accounts and pretending to be someone else. He actively tries to protect himself this way. He then returns to contact again, sending offensive private messages and making threats.

    His mother is also aware of this, but she does not have the energy to address it. In her defense, she once said that when they are out together, he does not cause any harm and appears kind and harmless in public. However, he is aggressive and violent at home and online.

Reply
  • Hi, and thank you for your response.

    I shared my view that her son might benefit from some form of professional support, such as help from a psychologist or a similar professional. I, along with a few others who have been affected, have tried to explain that the situation is quite serious, as his behavior online goes against many social norms and, in some cases, the law. This includes inappropriate and harmful behavior toward children and women(sexually). He also expresses strong reactions to certain american words and has made statements that negative consequences could occur if people do not comply with his wishes.

    According to his mother, he also causes difficulties at home, and this is something she deals with on a daily basis. She has expressed that she believes others should also tolerate this behavior, as she feels he does not fully understand that what he is doing is wrong. She wants to accept and has chosen to accept the situation, as she has done for the past 30 years.

    I also want to add that I have reported him on several platforms. As a result, he has been suspended, but he keeps coming back using new accounts and pretending to be someone else. He actively tries to protect himself this way. He then returns to contact again, sending offensive private messages and making threats.

    His mother is also aware of this, but she does not have the energy to address it. In her defense, she once said that when they are out together, he does not cause any harm and appears kind and harmless in public. However, he is aggressive and violent at home and online.

Children
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