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Newbie question on role of PAs for adult son with autism

Maximum_30_characters

I’m a parent of a 21 year old adult son. Our LA is providing funding for a personal assistant a few hours per week.

Our son does not need a huge amount of support at home during the hours we usually have a PA. He gets home from college. He needs someone to make up his very simple supper which is a microwave pudding and a yogurt etc. Our son then amuses himself quite happily watching TV or playing on a computer. 


if he needs his bum wiped, he will ask for it, and the PA will do that bit.

The PA would be expected to answer the door if the bell rang, and deal with any emergencies like a fire. But that’s it.

our son is largely non-verbal, and does not like his habits broken, so taking him out during the PA hours would distress him. He doesn’t want his time interrupted by someone trying to ‘engage’ with him. He’s happy in life. Besides, we as his parents do that.

What this has meant is that the PA will just sit on the sofa for four hours, getting paid, doing absolutely nothing. Babysitting essentially.

What do others ask-or get their PA to do. I feel embarrassed to ask them to do housework, eg tidy up, clean the bathroom, as the house is everyone’s, not just our son’s. But could we or should we expect that from a PA?

all ideas truly welcome.

Parents
  • Maximum_30_characters said:
    What this has meant is that the PA will just sit on the sofa for four hours, getting paid, doing absolutely nothing. Babysitting essentially.

    I would work out when your son needs the input from the PA and schedule it to be at these times. Create a new routine around it (the change will be a bit difficult but the benefits will be worth it) 

    A good start would be to create a new routine where there is a review of the day at college, creating a checklist of what homework is needed and what prep is needed for the next days then schedule this when he would normaly do it.

    The act of this daily review can be a great way to plan the evening more sensible, avoid things falling through the cracks and get him into the habit of being mindful.

    Maximum_30_characters said:
    He needs someone to make up his very simple supper which is a microwave pudding and a yogurt etc.

    You could get them to make something healthier and more nutritious if you want to fill their time. Maybe teach your some some of the basics of looking after himself, even if he will learn through watching it being done day after day.

    Some basic nutrition advice while this is being prepared could also be useful to develop those life skills.

    Maximum_30_characters said:
    should we expect that from a PA?

    Why not ask the PA what they do for other people and ask their company what is the sort of tasks that are done by other PAs - they may come up with some good ideas.

    Maximum_30_characters said:
    if he needs his bum wiped, he will ask for it, and the PA will do that bit.

    Have you considered a bidet? If he is able to handle washing himself then this could be another good skill for him to learn that gives more independence.

Reply
  • Maximum_30_characters said:
    What this has meant is that the PA will just sit on the sofa for four hours, getting paid, doing absolutely nothing. Babysitting essentially.

    I would work out when your son needs the input from the PA and schedule it to be at these times. Create a new routine around it (the change will be a bit difficult but the benefits will be worth it) 

    A good start would be to create a new routine where there is a review of the day at college, creating a checklist of what homework is needed and what prep is needed for the next days then schedule this when he would normaly do it.

    The act of this daily review can be a great way to plan the evening more sensible, avoid things falling through the cracks and get him into the habit of being mindful.

    Maximum_30_characters said:
    He needs someone to make up his very simple supper which is a microwave pudding and a yogurt etc.

    You could get them to make something healthier and more nutritious if you want to fill their time. Maybe teach your some some of the basics of looking after himself, even if he will learn through watching it being done day after day.

    Some basic nutrition advice while this is being prepared could also be useful to develop those life skills.

    Maximum_30_characters said:
    should we expect that from a PA?

    Why not ask the PA what they do for other people and ask their company what is the sort of tasks that are done by other PAs - they may come up with some good ideas.

    Maximum_30_characters said:
    if he needs his bum wiped, he will ask for it, and the PA will do that bit.

    Have you considered a bidet? If he is able to handle washing himself then this could be another good skill for him to learn that gives more independence.

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