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Running around school

Amh91

Im new here, im at the end and feel so done in. 

My son (8) has been at a main stream school since nursery. Ever since reception they noticed he has traits of autism and we knew this from a young age he had them, stimming, finding certain things difficult, hated changes even down to bedding. Now fast forward to year 3 and he started actually learning, struggled to get into school and in class but his teacher was great. 4 months  before end of school she left. Since then he has retreated. Barely spoke to any one. School work slowly stopped and then he started fleeing the class room. The school allowed this and he then found routine in sitting in the library. Summer holidays come and hes now entered year 4. Hes still not wanting to work or go into class at all. Hes now running around while doing this laughing or smiling which the school are saying its not him struggling its a choice. Basically saying hes being naughty. Does any one have any advice for me here as they want a meeting. One mum who just feels like shes failing 

Parents

  • Laughing and smiling doesn't necessarily mean it's a choice behaviour. He may be masking or it may be a nervous laugh. Flight behaviour is often anxiety driven. It may also be that he gets something out of the behaviour sensory wise or dopamine hit. There is also a possibility that it is a choice but one driven by fear - by this I mean that some kids will "act up" in an attempt to get sent home or kicked out of school because they are so anxious about being there. Sometimes it can be a bit of I can so I will, testing the boundaries to see what school will do - that is a bit more choice behaviour. But I doubt that your son is just "being naughty". There's always a reason of some description for behaviour.

    Is your son able to explain his behaviour/feelings at all? To give you some insight into why he is running around the school.

    If not, sometimes it can help to really break down the day. Give him a simple scale to follow that is something like feels easy to feels difficult or feels good to terrible what every suits his understanding. Then go through his day, starting at the very beginning with getting out of bed. You might find you can pin point when it goes wrong which can lead you closer to finding out why. Once you know when it goes wrong you can try things like have him choose the emotion he feels at that time from pictures. Is it scared, is it silly etc. It may help to do a weekend day first where he might be a bit comfortable answering and then move onto a school day. Just a suggestion.

  • in reply to Expecto_Patronum

    Hi! He can sometimes be shut off wont explain how he feels its either happy, sad or angry. So quite straight to the point. Thats really helpful advice with the going through the day asking how it feels. He does get a little agitated with too many questions ect but ill give it a go with some flash cards maybe. Thank you. I think problem is the school just see it as naughty and im then hitting a brick wall. 

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  • in reply to Expecto_Patronum

    Hi! He can sometimes be shut off wont explain how he feels its either happy, sad or angry. So quite straight to the point. Thats really helpful advice with the going through the day asking how it feels. He does get a little agitated with too many questions ect but ill give it a go with some flash cards maybe. Thank you. I think problem is the school just see it as naughty and im then hitting a brick wall. 

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