Ear defenders for a 3 year old

Perhaps buy ear defenders in an adult size. If they are not strictly for ear protection (e.g., when using machinery), not having a tight fit is not that important. They will still reduce the noise levels even if they are a little too loose to be fully protective.

If the headband is plastic, it might be possible to loosen it by stretching it and applying a little heat from a hairdryer.

I'm 50 years older than your son and I'm still finding noise a problem. It's usually the type of noise, rather than the volume, that gets to me. Even something as quiet as the humming of a fridge can set me on edge. A few days ago, I got stuck listening to three awful pop songs in a row while eating dinner. By the third song I'd lost the ability to speak, had to get out of the room, find a quiet spot and work hard for half an hour to calm down. I'm not normally that sensitive; I was probably a bit stressed and tired to start with. Ear defenders would have been a big help if I'd had them to hand.

So, you're doing the right thing. Your efforts to find the right ear defenders will really pay off for your son and make it easier for him to manage noisy environments. Stick with it and he'll thank you for it.

Thank you for your insight. That’s a brilliant suggestion about the bigger size. Yes, I’m finding with my son, it doesn’t have to be loud these days, sometimes I don’t even hear what he is hearing. Thank you, I appreciate it.

K8988 said:

Yes, I’m finding with my son, it doesn’t have to be loud these days,

There is nothing unusual about not liking certain noises and feeling irritated, on edge, or freaked out. If you heard the quiet, high-pitched whine of a mosquito close to your ear, you'd probably feel uneasy at best. You'd probably really want it to STOP! If it followed you around all day, you'd be stressed out and cranky. That's normal.

Your son is also reacting quite normally to some of the sounds he hears that he doesn't like. The only difference is that they might not be sounds that you find problematic, so it's hard for you to tell or predict if he'll have difficulties. Keep the ear defenders at hand, though, and they should be a big help.

It's also possible that you son doesn't even realise that noises are causing him irritation and stress, so he might not be able to communicate his distress and might not know if it's a good time to slip on the ear defenders. You'll have to help him with that. This has been my own experience. I used to get stressed and irritable doing the grocery shopping. One day last year, I decided to wear noise-cancelling earbuds (no music, just the NC) and when I got to the till I was feeling almost eerily calm. I never realised that the general background noise was my issue. I had always thought it was more to do with there being too many people. And it only took me 50 years to figure that out!

There is also some evidence that many Autistic people don't habituate to sounds the way most non-Autistic people do. Most people can "get used to" a noise and it becomes part of the background hum and can be ignored. Not all Autistic people can do that: the noise is always there, just as loud and just as irritating. There's only so much of that anyone can take before they really need a break.

K8988 said:

Yes, I’m finding with my son, it doesn’t have to be loud these days,

There is nothing unusual about not liking certain noises and feeling irritated, on edge, or freaked out. If you heard the quiet, high-pitched whine of a mosquito close to your ear, you'd probably feel uneasy at best. You'd probably really want it to STOP! If it followed you around all day, you'd be stressed out and cranky. That's normal.

Your son is also reacting quite normally to some of the sounds he hears that he doesn't like. The only difference is that they might not be sounds that you find problematic, so it's hard for you to tell or predict if he'll have difficulties. Keep the ear defenders at hand, though, and they should be a big help.

It's also possible that you son doesn't even realise that noises are causing him irritation and stress, so he might not be able to communicate his distress and might not know if it's a good time to slip on the ear defenders. You'll have to help him with that. This has been my own experience. I used to get stressed and irritable doing the grocery shopping. One day last year, I decided to wear noise-cancelling earbuds (no music, just the NC) and when I got to the till I was feeling almost eerily calm. I never realised that the general background noise was my issue. I had always thought it was more to do with there being too many people. And it only took me 50 years to figure that out!

There is also some evidence that many Autistic people don't habituate to sounds the way most non-Autistic people do. Most people can "get used to" a noise and it becomes part of the background hum and can be ignored. Not all Autistic people can do that: the noise is always there, just as loud and just as irritating. There's only so much of that anyone can take before they really need a break.

Yes, I agree. I’ll definitely keep them at hand and keep trying them.