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Is it right to call it abuse

NAS75657

My Son is nearly nine, he’s usually a very happy and loving child.  If he feels emotions like frustration, disappointment or pain he will bite and pinch his caregivers. We are awaiting  support for this from the Learning Disabilry team.  He does have communication delays but he is verbal. My Sister has called the pinching and biting child on parent. abuse this has really upset me especially as my sister has worked with Autistic children for a few years.  Is this terminology right or fair 

Parents
  • NAS75657 said:
    My Sister has called the pinching and biting child on parent. abuse

    I suspect that it would need to be intentional to be considered abusive, but for us to give a meaningful opinion then we would need a lot more detail around the context and history of what is happening to provoke the pinching / biting.

    At the end of the day the biting is quite dangerous, especially as he grows and can cause real damage so I would think that getting professional help would be the most effective way forward.

    Do you have any child therapists working with him? They should be able to craft a treatment plan to discourage his pain giving responses and replace them with something healthier. The link Eunice Mod has given does give a lot more info.

    It seems quite common these days for anyone subject to such an attack to immediately play the victim and demant retribution - do you think this is what is happening here? If it has always been your sons behaviour then it seems odd that they start to name it abuse now so there may be more at play with your sister and having an open and direct discussion may help get to the bottom of it.

    All this is just my non-professional opinion so please consider it as such.

Reply
  • NAS75657 said:
    My Sister has called the pinching and biting child on parent. abuse

    I suspect that it would need to be intentional to be considered abusive, but for us to give a meaningful opinion then we would need a lot more detail around the context and history of what is happening to provoke the pinching / biting.

    At the end of the day the biting is quite dangerous, especially as he grows and can cause real damage so I would think that getting professional help would be the most effective way forward.

    Do you have any child therapists working with him? They should be able to craft a treatment plan to discourage his pain giving responses and replace them with something healthier. The link Eunice Mod has given does give a lot more info.

    It seems quite common these days for anyone subject to such an attack to immediately play the victim and demant retribution - do you think this is what is happening here? If it has always been your sons behaviour then it seems odd that they start to name it abuse now so there may be more at play with your sister and having an open and direct discussion may help get to the bottom of it.

    All this is just my non-professional opinion so please consider it as such.

Children
  • in reply to Iain

    Hi. He does have a support worker in place.  It’s been going on for about a year, It usually happens when he’s finding something difficult, but doesn’t want any help,communicating his wants and the more he’s not understood the more frustrated he gets, if he unable to do something he wants to but is for a variety of justifiable reasons, if myself and his Dad argue, if he gets a minor injury..It is all emotion based.  He very accasionally does as he is sensory  seeking.  I find communicating difficult if he’s distressed as I become anxious. but there is a general communication barrier with him and his Dad, his Dad can’t get to grips that our Sons communicates differently to Neurotypical people