Hi All
My daughter is 12 years old and in her first year of secondary school.
For the first six months of secondary school my daughter was able to function within school and to mask, but at home the meltdowns were happening after school and my daughter started to become angry and withdraw from going to clubs. In April it finally reached a point where my daughter was experiencing autism burn out.
For a nearly two week period my daughter would not go into school. After considering all our options including home school, the school agreed that my daughter could go in their bridge provision full time if she returned to school, previously my daughter had been able to access Bridge for one lesson a day.
My daughter returned to school and flourished in bridge away from the stimulation of full lessons with lots of people in them.
After two weeks and a half term break, the school approached my daughter, without informing myself or my husband, and told her she had to start going to lessons. My daughter who is extremely compliant agreed to the teachers demands and then came home and broke down saying she was not ready to go to lessons.
I approached the school and asked them to forestall my daughter going to lessons as she had not received any therapeutic support around her anxiety about school and classes and we had no input from OT as to how to manage her growing sensory needs.
Again the school approached my daughter and said we will try one lesson a day and then up it to two lessons a day then three, until eventually she would be in all lessons by the six weeks holidays.
Again my daughter complied and again she came home and had a melt down and could not regulate herself. She just keeps saying to us 'I cant do it, I like bridge I don't feel anxious in Bridge'. Again we went back to the school and said my daughter could not cope with the increase in lessons and could we do two lessons per day until we had found appropriate support for her, The school then finally set up a meeting with the SENCO after I said I wanted to seek advice from the local authority and the autism society.
I met with SENCO and my daughter came with me, He said the schools aim was to have her in full time lessons by the summer holidays and to only have her go to bridge for five minutes at a time when needed to regulate, they said they wanted to 'break her attachment to bridge'.
I said I thought they were putting sticking plasters over the anxiety by not waiting until I could get some support from camhs for her and he ignored my comments,
My daughter who was with me and who will not say no to teachers agreed to everything the senco said about her going to full time lessons and not using Bridge, Even though I kept saying to her its okay to say you are not comfortable with this.
After the meeting, as soon as we had left the school car park my daughter broke down and had the biggest melt down she has every had. She kept saying to me 'I cant do full time lessons why don't they understand, what have I done wrong, I attend bridge and all my work is good'.
This happened Friday, since then my daughter has been twitching and ticing none stop and is hyper sensitive, She cant sleep and is constantly restless (this has been happening since the school mentioned moving her out of bridge).
I dont know what to do, I feel like the school are going to break her, she does not have an ehcp and is academically very good. The school are not telling me what my options are though or what else is out there if she cannot go to lessons. In fact they are not listening at all, the senco is not there for my daughter he is there to ensure the school rules are met.
All I want from the school is time for my daughter to receive support for her anxiety and time for an OT appointment as the last time she was assessed by OT she was 5 and her sensory needs are overwhelming this year for her,
I am waitiing for appointments with both OT and CAMHS,
On top of this her time table will change again in September will change again, so I will have to get her used to a new timetables all over again. When I raised this with the SENCO he said 'well a childs timetable can change at a days notice'.
I need advice and I need someone to be my daughters voice within school, who understands autism and demand avoidance anxiety disorder,
Sorry I know this is a long one, but all this 'change' has happened in the space of two weeks for my daughter and is overload for a child who does not like change.
