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Unmasking aged 8

Deleted User

Hello,

We are currently awaiting an assessment for autism/ASD for our 8 year old daughter. As she was growing up we noticed a few little things that we just thought made our darling daughter unique and when we reached out to the school they reassured us all was fine and nothing unusual. 

About 6 months ago she became very upset leaving me and going into school. It transpired that she was struggling with close contact with other children at school and the noise. The mask began lifting....she would come out exhausted and since then we have begun to understand just how difficult hiding her discomfort (mainly sensory) has been for her. Her behaviour has changed and each day we see her challenges more and more.

We are doing all we can to support her and I hope by having the diagnosis we can get more support for her and help her understand her amazing brain, which she has already said makes her different from others her age.

Has anyone experienced a rapid unmasking? I don't know why but I always thought it would be gradual. It has left me feeling like our life has changed almost overnight as we learn to navigate this new world. Part of me feels foolish as I always felt deep down that there was something there. 

It sounds awful but in some ways I feel I am grieving for the future I thought she would have and we would have with her. 

I would love to hear from others that may have experienced something similar. Obviously I love my daughter and know with time we will know how best to navigate things and she will have a wonderful life, but at the moment I feel like I am at sea.

Many thanks x

Parents

  • Hi  

    I hope you are doing okay. Your post stood out to me as it sounds very similar to what I’m currently going through with my daughter age 9 and I’m finding it very overwhelming and scary as I try to navigate this new period. As am sure my daughter is too.

    I never thought about the current difficulties we are experiencing as unmasking but I think this could be the reason for the sudden changes that seem to have come out of no where e.g. she’s always been able to wear socks, although it has been a struggle in the past, and since the last 4 months it’s too much. Like you my daughter is also now finding it very difficult to leave me.

    I just wanted to share my current situation so you may feel less alone. X

Reply

  • Hi  

    I hope you are doing okay. Your post stood out to me as it sounds very similar to what I’m currently going through with my daughter age 9 and I’m finding it very overwhelming and scary as I try to navigate this new period. As am sure my daughter is too.

    I never thought about the current difficulties we are experiencing as unmasking but I think this could be the reason for the sudden changes that seem to have come out of no where e.g. she’s always been able to wear socks, although it has been a struggle in the past, and since the last 4 months it’s too much. Like you my daughter is also now finding it very difficult to leave me.

    I just wanted to share my current situation so you may feel less alone. X

Children
  • in reply to DolphinDreamer

    I think many autistic children are put under tremendous pressure by being in school - they try to cope but there can come a point where they can’t maintain it anymore. I remember a few months after my youngest first started school he started tearing up paper into  tiny pieces. Then he drew a picture of his teacher being attacked by countless tiny mice! So the signs are there - you just have to be alert to the changes in behaviour that indicate they are in distress.