How to explain comments scaring other kids

My son (8) is struggling with some of the social aspects at school and will say things such as saying “I love to eat blood” and things that are starting to alienate him more from his peers as “he’s creepy”. When asked he says he “likes creepy things” and “shouldn’t he be himself”. 

We’ve done a lot of work on appropriate touch and physical side and he’s been doing really well so I don’t want him to feel left out by this as he’s made some friends as he’s so much happier now he can play with others.

Parents
  • You could say you say don't talk about this stuff with them even if it does not scare you it scares them and you don't want to scare them do you? What if they scared you? they don't see it the way you do and that's that. Talk about stuff you have in common instead with these kids.

    He's not gonna be everyone's friend and everyone is not going to be his friend always and 4 ever and that's that. He's gonna find his best friend or friends and they will him, I am sure.

    I get that you don't want him alienated but all these groups of children can change over time too. 

    I know it breaks your heart and worries you that he is labeled creepy but I would think rather creepy than him being picked on. I don't think they dare to pick on him. But alienate? Yes. And of course that's a problem. 

    Kids can be so cruel and they will think nothing of it from one moment to the next, their brains developing, but know that all things do change over time. Try to find comfort in that. 

    As a parent you want to get in there but you can't always do that unless it gets really bad, usually it blows over and like I said things change a lot over period of time and as they grow. He will be all about blood for a period of time and then drop it off to something else. What does the blood passion come from? Do you know? Is it Dracula stuff? Halloween? Doctor's stuff? Interest in the medical stuff? What is it? I would try to get in to it but not ask in a way to make him think you think he's bad or that he has a bad interest but more neutral or interested, curious. I would sit down with him and play or if he for instance like to draw draw with him, do what he does and take the conversation in his pace. If you find out what it is and that's more safe for him to express to his friends, like that is an interest he has that is not creepy, presented in a creepy way, then they might not find him that way. They will then get, understand what's it about. 

Reply
  • You could say you say don't talk about this stuff with them even if it does not scare you it scares them and you don't want to scare them do you? What if they scared you? they don't see it the way you do and that's that. Talk about stuff you have in common instead with these kids.

    He's not gonna be everyone's friend and everyone is not going to be his friend always and 4 ever and that's that. He's gonna find his best friend or friends and they will him, I am sure.

    I get that you don't want him alienated but all these groups of children can change over time too. 

    I know it breaks your heart and worries you that he is labeled creepy but I would think rather creepy than him being picked on. I don't think they dare to pick on him. But alienate? Yes. And of course that's a problem. 

    Kids can be so cruel and they will think nothing of it from one moment to the next, their brains developing, but know that all things do change over time. Try to find comfort in that. 

    As a parent you want to get in there but you can't always do that unless it gets really bad, usually it blows over and like I said things change a lot over period of time and as they grow. He will be all about blood for a period of time and then drop it off to something else. What does the blood passion come from? Do you know? Is it Dracula stuff? Halloween? Doctor's stuff? Interest in the medical stuff? What is it? I would try to get in to it but not ask in a way to make him think you think he's bad or that he has a bad interest but more neutral or interested, curious. I would sit down with him and play or if he for instance like to draw draw with him, do what he does and take the conversation in his pace. If you find out what it is and that's more safe for him to express to his friends, like that is an interest he has that is not creepy, presented in a creepy way, then they might not find him that way. They will then get, understand what's it about. 

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