Published on 12, July, 2020
Despite knowing deep down for a very long time, our 20 year son was yesterday officially diagnosed as Autistic. On telling him, the assessor congratulated him and said the world would be a better place with more Autistic people in it! I felt very emotional yet positive on hearing him say those words and our son, well I think he is in some ways relieved.
What I would like to ask people now, is how to take things from here. It will be up to our son of course, who he chooses to tell, but I don't want him to think we are hiding it or keeping it a secret. A friend of mine when her 12 year old son was diagnosed, they had a little party.. our son is too old for that, but i want to acknowledge it and how proud we are in some ways.
Where do we take things from here?
thank you for your time
thank you for this x
thank you so much
thank you for taking the time to reply, i shall look into that link x
Neither of my son’s like ‘a big fuss’ being made of anything - let alone a diagnosis of something! I’d just ask your son what he actually wants - and be led by him.
NAS93882 said:A friend of mine when her 12 year old son was diagnosed, they had a little party.. our son is too old for that,
Nah, just make sure it is a party he would want to go to. Maybe have some good junk food, beer (or whatever booze he likes) and invite some of his friends - he would probably enjoy being celebrated a bit plus it is a good way to get spread more positivity about neurodivergence.
NAS93882 said:Where do we take things from here?
Point out that he now has the knowledge of how his mind works so he should start researching the subject and learn ways to make his life easier and live it better.
Point him to this site for advice and where to ask difficult questions.
Maybe get him a therapist to help accept his diagnosis and develp skills to help with anxiety and other autism related traits - just make sure the therapist is experienced in the field of autism.
I absolutely love this post! And I’m happy, that there are people, who support their loved ones on their discovery journey.
That's really nice that you and your friend want to celebrate the discovery that your sons are autistic. Maybe you could have a movie night, just the family, with whatever foods or snacks your son enjoys?
Also, have you seen any of the lists of strengths that autism can bring? This can be very uplifting. Heres a nice one below, perhaps you could print it off?
https://www.gallagherbassett.com.au/ohs-posters/poster-autism-the-strengths/
Hi NAS93882, congratulations on your son's diagnosis. While disclosure is a very personal decision, our guide on Disclosing autism might be useful: https://autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/diagnosis/disclosing-your-autism. It is directed more at autistic adults and parents of younger children, but it could be helpful to better understand what approaches your son may be considering.
I hope this is useful.
Best wishes,
Anna Mod