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Anxiety

NAS75657

My seven year old son iz getting very anxious and upset over the last couple of days. It’s about making sure we’re going to the places we say we’re going to. It doesn’t help that the change in routine over christmas has caused him to sleep poorly and made him unwell  and extremely tired.. Any advice?  

  • in reply to NAS75657

    I take my Son to an equestrian based therapy session. He works on the horses with grooming and stuff like that. It’s very subtle but he talks to his therapist while he’s busy focusing on his little jobs. I’ve found it’s easier to communicate with him while he’s busy at home as well. I never try to guess what he’s feeling or what’s bothering him and a lot of the time he doesn’t understand why he feels the way he does. These are things that I have learned from his therapist which seem to really help and make for a calmer environment at home where he feels safe and in control.

    take care 

  • I'm so sorry your son is struggling. Christmas is one big change and anxiety trigger so it's no wonder he was anxious around then and likely is still feeling the effects of it now. 

    As others have said it's key to let him know about any changes to routine as soon as possible and to give him to process these changes and adjust accordingly. And if he's tired make sure he rests when possible as rest will give his body and mind time to recover. 

    Really sorry he's going through this and I hope he feels better soon.

  • in reply to Take5

    Thanks, No, my son doesn’t have therapy. 

  • Hey there

    my son has just turned 9 yrs old. He started year 4 and everything blew up from there really. Most of his anxieties centre around school/homework and as you have mentioned changes in routine. I try to tell my son in advance of what is going to happen and break it down into parts. As Auto said try to give as much warning as possible. I brought my son a whiteboard on a stand and some markers as I find it helps his anxiety if he writes things down, then when he’s done things he can cross them off his list. With sleep I try to stick to a rigid routine as in time, we also have a warm milky drink and a hot water bottle before bed. I just try to make his bedtime routine the same every night regardless of what is going on really. Does or has your son had any kind of therapy? I can only speak for my son but although he will never be free from anxiety he is able to manage it a little better now. We did find that to make some positive changes that it was us as parents that had to adjust how we did things and to just be mindful. I’m no expert as I’m pretty much at the beginning of the journey but just letting you know what helps for us. 

    good luck with everything 

  • It sounds as if he was already anxious and upset as a result of having his routine disrupted over Christmas. What has happened over the last couple of days sounds more like his way of coming to terms with it and seeking reassurance that the same thing isn't going to happen again.

    Autistic people can really struggle with sudden changes and if something doesn't happen when they expect it will. Knowing what will happen and when makes things easier to process and less anxiety inducing.

    https://thinkingautismguide.com/2022/04/understanding-how-routines-can-help-autistic-people.html

    If a change of routine has to happen for whatever reason then try to give him as much notice as possible and allow time for him to be able to process the change. Knowing what to expect can reduce anxiety, he is asking questions about what to expect as a way of reducing his anxiety. Answer him honestly, so that he can be prepared if there is a risk that he won't be able to go to those places.