Hello,
I am a single parent and live with my 20-year-old son A. He was only diagnosed with ADHD and autism as an adult, and has not been in school since being 14. A also has depression, memory issues (partly as a result of the emotional/physical abuse from his father, my ex-husband.) Apart from some short-term art and animal care courses, doesn’t seem to be able to handle work or education. A lot of the time, A’s a lovely person but sometimes can display a lot of challenging behaviour (screaming when down, depression, negativity, wanting a lot of attention)
My issue is that I can’t care for him anymore, at least not 24/7. I have my own mental health issues, probably resulting from PTSD as a result of being in an abusive marriage. Also I feel that there needs more people than just me to help A make the most out of life now that he’s an adult.
I did get in touch with social services in August, saying I was struggling and wanting support for my son to become more independent, which he initially agreed to. However, as it took so long for social services to respond, by the time they did, A was recovering from a planned operation and then had Covid. So as my son hasn’t “engaged” within a six-week deadline, social services have now closed the case. So disheartening. I really need someone to help care for him, as he relies on me a lot to interact socially for him.
Has anyone been in this position, and if so, what did you do? I would really love A to go into supported living, with the option of being at home some of the time. If this doesn’t happen and he still depends on me as much as he has done, I’m going to have to sell the house, which is of course his safe space. I’m on benefits and a minimum-wage, part-time job, which is all I can do.
Thank you very much for reading this.