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Severe anxiety school refusal

NAS89174

Hi everyone my little boy is 12 and has autism and tyoe 1 diabetes he is also being tested for ADHD. Currently he is having autistic meltdowns in school reception, it takes a lot of physical effort just to get him through the doors. He is refusing school, resulting in kicking and punching everyone around him. I have spoken to the SENCO and she says she does not know what to do. Today I took him to the GP who said he has anxiety and the best way to deal with that is to attend school. Im talking to IPSEA as soon as I can get through. Im speaking to the senco and the deputy head, ive got my son counselling with no limits which is starting soon. 

However non of this helps at the moment, he is waking several times a night each time crying out is it time for school yet? Its heartbreaking. Ive read the book the explosive child and its not helping really. 

Does anyone anywhere have any suggestions? anything at all that will help?

Thanks

Sammy

Parents

  • I feel that the school should be helping to address the issues here. The SENCo saying she doesn't know what to do isn't really good enough, in my view - whilst understanding that SEND provision may be under-resourced in some schools, nonetheless she should be able to come up with some ideas. 

    I see some views here that all school is a problem for all children with autism. I understand why a lot of adults would hold that view, I think it used to be a lot worse, but it should not, need not be like that now. 

    Your son doesn't want to go to school for his own reasons, presumably school-related. If you know what those are, maybe that's a way in to go back to the school and work on a plan to help him. 

    Some general ideas- if there are lessons he struggles with, can he get extra support? Does his school have LSAs who could help with this? If some learning environments are challenging for your son, can the school provide an alternative? Most schools have pastoral spaces, some have dedicated SEN spaces. Could the school work on a plan with your son to do some of his lessons in class as a starting point - the subjects he enjoys best, to begin with, and go from there? Are there social problems for your son at school? Anything like that should hopefully have been picked up on by the school already, but obviously teasing, bullying, exclusion, are things that may discourage your son from attending school. 

    I don't know if any of that helps, but thoughts, at least. 

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  • I feel that the school should be helping to address the issues here. The SENCo saying she doesn't know what to do isn't really good enough, in my view - whilst understanding that SEND provision may be under-resourced in some schools, nonetheless she should be able to come up with some ideas. 

    I see some views here that all school is a problem for all children with autism. I understand why a lot of adults would hold that view, I think it used to be a lot worse, but it should not, need not be like that now. 

    Your son doesn't want to go to school for his own reasons, presumably school-related. If you know what those are, maybe that's a way in to go back to the school and work on a plan to help him. 

    Some general ideas- if there are lessons he struggles with, can he get extra support? Does his school have LSAs who could help with this? If some learning environments are challenging for your son, can the school provide an alternative? Most schools have pastoral spaces, some have dedicated SEN spaces. Could the school work on a plan with your son to do some of his lessons in class as a starting point - the subjects he enjoys best, to begin with, and go from there? Are there social problems for your son at school? Anything like that should hopefully have been picked up on by the school already, but obviously teasing, bullying, exclusion, are things that may discourage your son from attending school. 

    I don't know if any of that helps, but thoughts, at least. 

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