siblings

Hi randomgrl

Like you I am very close to and have always been involved in the care of my brother.  He is now in his mid 60s and is severely disabled by autism.  Our parents are no longer alive and we have no other brothers and sisters, so his relationship with me has actually been the biggest constant throughout his life.

Siblings can carry quite a heavy burden, one that changes at different stages in life - coping as a child, as an adolescent, and as a young adult in a family that is 'different' and often with considerable challenges - then supporting parents as they get older and less able to cope with the needs of an autistic son or daughter (even if they're no longer the primary carers) - and then ultimately shouldering all the feeling of responsibility once your parents die.  My parents tried very hard to ensure I never felt disadvantaged as a child by our family circumstances - they were amazing and they succeeded - but I know my mum always felt guilty about the impact it's had on my life overall.

I love my brother and wouldn't be without him for the worId.  He has enriched my life in countless ways.  He is very special.  But I have often wished that I had another brother or sister to be able to talk things through with, someone else as close to my brother as I am. My husband and family are very understanding and supportive but being sole sibling can still be a lonely business at times, so I welcome this forum where hopefully some of our worries can be shared and addressed.  

I know quite a few people who have an autistic child, but I've just realised while writing this that I don't think I've ever met or spoken to anyone else whose adult brother or sister is autistic.   It would be great to hear from other siblings out there.

Thank you National Autistic Society for being there - you're doing a great job!

Hi randomgrl

Like you I am very close to and have always been involved in the care of my brother.  He is now in his mid 60s and is severely disabled by autism.  Our parents are no longer alive and we have no other brothers and sisters, so his relationship with me has actually been the biggest constant throughout his life.

Siblings can carry quite a heavy burden, one that changes at different stages in life - coping as a child, as an adolescent, and as a young adult in a family that is 'different' and often with considerable challenges - then supporting parents as they get older and less able to cope with the needs of an autistic son or daughter (even if they're no longer the primary carers) - and then ultimately shouldering all the feeling of responsibility once your parents die.  My parents tried very hard to ensure I never felt disadvantaged as a child by our family circumstances - they were amazing and they succeeded - but I know my mum always felt guilty about the impact it's had on my life overall.

I love my brother and wouldn't be without him for the worId.  He has enriched my life in countless ways.  He is very special.  But I have often wished that I had another brother or sister to be able to talk things through with, someone else as close to my brother as I am. My husband and family are very understanding and supportive but being sole sibling can still be a lonely business at times, so I welcome this forum where hopefully some of our worries can be shared and addressed.  

I know quite a few people who have an autistic child, but I've just realised while writing this that I don't think I've ever met or spoken to anyone else whose adult brother or sister is autistic.   It would be great to hear from other siblings out there.

Thank you National Autistic Society for being there - you're doing a great job!