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Anyone else feel like School doesn't listen?

NAS81388

Just background info I've 4 children, 2 of them have autism. 

This is a long one... TW for suicidal talk

My  child who was diagnosed with autism with a few years ago has always had an issue with going to school, nursery he would hit staff, refuse to go in. The amount of times I'd have to take him home Face palm

Throughout his time there, he's been given alot of red reports. Assaulting staff and students, saying inappropriate things, meltdowns, refusing to go. 

This year I decided enough was enough as I saw all the support my other son ( has autism but has a 1 to 1 home sen teacher that is provided by local council for his age group.. that sort of thing) 

I made a meeting with the school SENCO after constant back and forth with teachers. To try sort something out for him  after him being denied a reduced time table, time off or time out of class to recharge.  I told the SENCO.  His works failing, his attendance is bad and all he says every day is he wants to take his own life because of going to school.

He's no friends, can't cope with the work and the days too long for him. Everyday it's a meltdown for him.   I was told her could get a learning mentor 1 hour a week and to make a jar of 3 happy things from School that he likes..  I told her he will tell me he hates school. He's even said really inappropriate things about how he would take his own life and others on school. 

I was ignored and brushed off.. this week I was FUMING! I got a call from the SENCO acting all sincere saying my son had mentioned self half and it may be a shock to me?!!   I thought I was dreaming.   After a short discussion I'd said I don't understand I made a meeting eith her months ago and told her and had told the staff multiple times about how he was and now he's mentioned it once to them suddenly they are all shocked.. she then starts saying she think it would be good for him to have time off from school!!  After saying to be he's not severe enough and doesn't meet criteria..   

I tried to remain calm and get the point across of I don't even know why this is a conversation now suddenly they can offer XYZ Face palm has anyone else had the school dismiss them like this? 

  • "Time off from school" sounds like an illegal exclusion. Schools are not allowed to send kids home because they have SEND. Schools are only allowed to exclude kids for disciplinary reasons, and only then if they have provided SEND support if that is relevant. A restricted timetable is permitted for a short time, but only if it is discussed at a SEND meeting, parents agree and there is a plan to return to full-time education with appropriate support. If the school is not listening, talk to the SEND adviser at the local education authority. Then get advice from a special support service such as the NAS, or find a lawyer. 

  • Schools have become Warzones, alas.

    It reinforces the 'Us and Them' mindset; in order to phase out the Middle Class.

    No Billionaire credited School for their achievements. It's designed to keep you poor.

  • NAS81388 said:
     After a short discussion I'd said I don't understand I made a meeting eith her months ago and told her and had told the staff multiple times about how he was and now he's mentioned it once to them suddenly they are all shocked.

    This is just typical human bad behaviour from the school - they thought they knew better and that you were just an overprotective mother that should be ignored.

    Now that things are looking serious they are trying to avoid responsibility for their failing to take action (or even record notes it seems).at the time.

    Ask to see their notes from your discussion - I'll bet they didn't take any.

    In future try to send emails to the school so you have proof  that you told them things. It also means that if the SENCO is suddenly replaced for incompetence / lies then the new one will have good notes to work from.

  • To add the school has also told me he doesn't have a support plan or anything in place because he's not seen as severe enough.  ( he aged 7)