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My son is a very vulnerable young adult who will care for him when i die?.

NAS83342

I absolutely adore my son and have basically pushed any1 away that would harm him ..First off the potential husband had to go as my son said he had hit him and the guy said that he was lying. I took my sons side over it as he said that the guy had hit him..when it turned out in the end my son was in fact lying he admitted to me the guy hadnt hit him.Then my parents had to go as I grew up in care and they were abusive so did not want that around my son,then my sons side of the family basicaly ditched him when I told them about his diagnosis and his dad is an (alcoholic and most likely has asd also and schizophrenia and sadly never got the help and is a mess lives in a caravan allays moving and never even gave my son one moment of his time was never there for him. Also we very isolated because my son can't have people round the house its too much for him etc..what worries me is what's going to happen to my son when I die as no one cares about him but me and I don't have the finances to have any care in place for him when I die. I don't know where he is on the spectrum tbh but he is VERY vulnerable for example he just gives all his money  away on the street and has none for himself and no its not him being charitable either he explained it once to me but I forget now but he doesn't see the alterior motives of people that could wish him harm I thought he'd grow out of it as when he was a little boy I found out he wasn't eating at school and it was because it turned out the lady on the till when he went to get his drink in the canteen took all his money ie he would open his purse and shed just take it all and its the same now.

  • You probably need to talk to a solicitor with experience in the Mental Capacity Act and the Court of Protection.  If you have financial assets you can set up a trust so he can use the income but not the capital unless the trustees agree. You can also arrange for somebody to handle his financial affairs, including welfare benefits. Get legal advice.

  • in reply to Peter

    I have an Uncle he's mentally handicapped. He and I are roughly the same age (69). He was ok at first, and then they think something may have bitten him while we were paddling in the sea while on holiday at Rhyl. My Nan never ever forgave our doctor for not picking it up sooner, when something may have been done. But all our P**L could say as 4yo was, he had a headache in his leg. He has spent his entire life like a baby, not being able  to do or say anything

    I remember one New Year, i must have been about 9yo, sitting on the stairs with my Nan, she was crying..... "Who will look after our P**L after i die". Even at that young age, he was as strong as an Ox, and difficult to look after. Eventually as my Nan got older, he had to go into a home/hospital. My Nan hated giving him up, we would go to visit every week, but he didn't recognise us, he didn't know who we were. We were just people feeding him sweets.

  • Also how intelligent is your son? Lets not write of the possibility of him learning to care for himself, at least more than he does now. it's not automatic that he will just pick it up but these things can be taught.