Published on 12, July, 2020
My son is 14 and has recently been arrested for swearing at a police officer, breaking into empty buildings and smashing his ex's phone and glasses. He has been out of school for two terms and has recently been trying to return. This has coincided (no coincidence maybe?) with these most extreme incidents of antisocial behaviour.
The result is bail with a curfew of 6pm (which he is sticking to), a long wait to find out whether they will press charges and meanwhile, compulsory work with the youth offending team, and school deciding that there will be much more compulsion to whatever alternative provision they put in place with no option of going back to school.
This seems to be pretty intolerable for someone with PDA. But he presents as unremorseful, it's all someone else's fault, he doesn't want any help and please can I just buy him weed to take away the boredom. It makes him pretty hard to love and even harder to help.
I'm at my wit's end...
We are currently in a similar position with my 12 year old
Would it be okay to message you ? Many Thanks
You see the list of charges there is somebody interesting to me. Contrary to popular belief swearing at the police is not generally a crime. Swearing at people in general actually can be but specifically not the police because of a case law ruling to that effect. Breaking into empty buildings would be a serious issue if it actually involves physical breaking rather than merely trespass. If it’s a damaged or dilapidated building and he’s just gone through an all a already broken window that’s trespass not criminal damage. And trespass is a civil not a criminal matter.
so this young lad is not totally in the wrong when he says he’s being treated unfairly. It does sound like one or two of the three things he’s been accused of are not actually crimes.
anyway taking away the boredom doesn’t sound like a bad idea to me. obviously not with drugs. But getting him engaged with some sort of activity thaT he can do and enjoys, something to make him feel good about himself. is a really good and positive thing that should be tried
Hi, we are going through a very similar situation with our 14 yo son. Were you able to access support?
Hi
I have experience working within the Criminal justice system and in particular with people who have Neurodiversity including ASD - you can ask the police to consider liaison and diversion which is tailored to support your son and therefore avoid anything being placed on record and a court case.
If you need any further support please don't hesitate to get in touch
I have experience working within the Criminal justice system supporting people with neurodiverse conditions including autism.
You can ask the police to consider the court disposal route or sometimes called liaison and diversion which men's your son will receive the specialist support and therefore will not be processed through the usual court system.
Hope this helps and if you need anything further please don't hesitate to get in touch.
I have no experience with PDA but I found this channel on youtube, maybe you can find something useful there www.youtube.com/.../videos