Published on 12, July, 2020
I'm puzzled. My adult son (autistic/ADHD) feels better if he doesn't sleep. The longer he's awake, the better he feels. And, when he is eventually forced to sleep because his body takes over, he feels really bad both physically and mentally - neck and joint pain/discomfort, feeling his body is misaligned and often very distressed and angry too, triggering lots of connections to past negative experiences.
Naturally all of this flies in the face of the usual advice on the benefits of sleep and he really wants information on either how to stay awake longer or do polyphasic sleeping so that he never suffers the problems associated with sleeping for too long.
To me this all feels like a very unhealthy relationship with sleep and one that is likely to be reinforced as he sleeps less and less and notices the benefits So how might I help him?
Is there anywhere I can take longstanding, seemingly intractable problems like this? Other issues (not in the same family member) include severe, chronic burnout, withdrawal (to the point of becoming a hermit) and very poor hygiene (rest assured that sensory issues have been explored, to no avail).
I keep going round and round with the same stuff, year after year, and I fear I'm trapped in the role of carer for the rest of my life, without really understanding why. It's all making me ill.
But where can I turn to for robust advice and guidance?
(NB NOT counselling, which gives me a safe space in which to vent, explore my feelings and plan as far as possible but leaves the solutions to me - I don't have any and that's why I'm there!)