Other parents with teenage girls

Hello,
I don't know whether I can be of much help,
However I was in a very similar position 3 years ago.
When I was 14 I had been referred to a psychologist for anxiety and they (alongside me and my parents) had notices many autistic traits in my behaviour...

We were told that the wait for a diagnosis (in our area) was anywhere from 18 months to 3-4 years, and we're also made aware that if we went privately then the diagnosis could possibly still not aid in accessing services.

However, we decided to go privately as the wait a diagnosis would mean that I would be out of education by the time that I had received it. As well as this, personally I just really needed to know ASAP whether I was autistic or not, as I was really struggling to cope with the fact that I didn't know why I acted certain ways, or was made extremely anxious by change.

Honestly, it was the best decision for us to go privately. I think the whole process from being put on the list to get a private diagnosis and actually receiving the diagnosis was around 2 months. I had 4 assessment dates and they made a very detailed report which allowed both me, my parents and the school to understand me better. As well as this, they were also able to pick up on different sensory processing difficulties that I was experiencing as well as give me a separate diagnosis of dyspraxia...

Although we had been warned that the private diagnosis may not be viewed as valid as a NHS diagnosis, and we may not be able to access services, we found that this was not the case. We took the report to our local gp, which said that I had been given a diagnosis of autism and they added it to my medical records and referred us to an occupational therapist (as the report had recommended that I see them). The school have also been able to support more since the diagnosis. The teachers have been able to put different measures into place which have supported me. However most of all I was able to start to understand myself more - which I think was really really important.

I think a lot of support  is definitely tailored for for younger children; I have found that sadly, especially in my area, there is little to no support for teens with autism. For me it has been very much a journey of accepting my diagnosis, as well as managing the impacts of the the fact it was so late. 

But I think getting my diagnosis quickly was the door to beginning to accept my diagnosis, learning how to cope and ensuring that my mental/emotional/physical health wasn't hurt any more by the fact that I didn't have a diagnosis for a condition which was affecting me daily.

If you can get a private diagnosis (as I understand they are extremely expensive, and there is the worry that it will have no weight in accessing services) then I would highly recommend it.
I really hope that you are able to find the support that you need. I am also more than happy to answer any questions you may have.

Hello,
I don't know whether I can be of much help,
However I was in a very similar position 3 years ago.
When I was 14 I had been referred to a psychologist for anxiety and they (alongside me and my parents) had notices many autistic traits in my behaviour...

We were told that the wait for a diagnosis (in our area) was anywhere from 18 months to 3-4 years, and we're also made aware that if we went privately then the diagnosis could possibly still not aid in accessing services.

However, we decided to go privately as the wait a diagnosis would mean that I would be out of education by the time that I had received it. As well as this, personally I just really needed to know ASAP whether I was autistic or not, as I was really struggling to cope with the fact that I didn't know why I acted certain ways, or was made extremely anxious by change.

Honestly, it was the best decision for us to go privately. I think the whole process from being put on the list to get a private diagnosis and actually receiving the diagnosis was around 2 months. I had 4 assessment dates and they made a very detailed report which allowed both me, my parents and the school to understand me better. As well as this, they were also able to pick up on different sensory processing difficulties that I was experiencing as well as give me a separate diagnosis of dyspraxia...

Although we had been warned that the private diagnosis may not be viewed as valid as a NHS diagnosis, and we may not be able to access services, we found that this was not the case. We took the report to our local gp, which said that I had been given a diagnosis of autism and they added it to my medical records and referred us to an occupational therapist (as the report had recommended that I see them). The school have also been able to support more since the diagnosis. The teachers have been able to put different measures into place which have supported me. However most of all I was able to start to understand myself more - which I think was really really important.

I think a lot of support  is definitely tailored for for younger children; I have found that sadly, especially in my area, there is little to no support for teens with autism. For me it has been very much a journey of accepting my diagnosis, as well as managing the impacts of the the fact it was so late. 

But I think getting my diagnosis quickly was the door to beginning to accept my diagnosis, learning how to cope and ensuring that my mental/emotional/physical health wasn't hurt any more by the fact that I didn't have a diagnosis for a condition which was affecting me daily.

If you can get a private diagnosis (as I understand they are extremely expensive, and there is the worry that it will have no weight in accessing services) then I would highly recommend it.
I really hope that you are able to find the support that you need. I am also more than happy to answer any questions you may have.

Hello Lou, thanks so much for your reply, it is indeed very helpful.  You have confirmed what I was beginning to think regarding the private diagnosis.  It would be helpful all round just to know what we are dealing with.  Knowledge is power after all! I know going privately will be expensive but as you say it effects daily life. I am particularly keen for a diagnosis as there is talk of medicating my daughter for her anxiety. How you can treat someone without the full picture concerns me. 

It is reassuring to hear how you have accepted and moved on with your diagnosis.  Thank you again, your reply meant a lot.