Doors!

Hi, my little boy who is 5 has started displaying his obsessive behaviour around doors/gates/lights anything he can turn on/off or close. 
he used to obsess over gates and doors being closed when he was younger and it’s come back but even more obsessive.

please if you have any advice or tips on how to help with this obsession I’d be so grateful, when we are out or at home it’s not a problem but at school it’s become so apparent that he is hurting others (not intentionally) due to needing things to be closed.

thank you in advance for any help Pray tone2

  • SO TRUE...

    I love kids like this to be honest. 

  • Yeah, they really did like my attention to detail and fussiness. I've heard it said that many people with Aspergers discover that grandad was an engineer. 

    And what you really want is that the engineer tasked with inspecting and the next engineer tasked with the duplicate inspections of disturbed components actually does the inspecting PROPERLY and don't just "pen it off"... 

  • I agree ^^

    This might not be an 'obsession'. It could be an intentional exacting for all kinds of calculations he's doing in his mind. In fact, these are safety components which an inspections officer would be concerned with for offices or buildings. We want individuals who will leave no stone unturned in these positions.

    OCD is usually irrational behaviour, such as opening and closing a drawer several times before leaving the house and then maybe saying a mantra on repeat. 

    Being methodical about finalising a task is potentially the grounding element here. This may become important for everything he does and better to be aware of it. It is the mark of someone reliable, trustworthy. Having no loose ends or unresolved matters is something autistic individuals can naturally be capable of.

    Now, what you can do is encourage a fluxuation with pace or a wobbly timeline. For instance, if shutting a thing completely is happening at school before another child has finished taking what they need, you'll need to help your son allow for the measured time for a thing to be open. 

    I'd much rather a mechanic work on the aircraft I'm sitting in be naturally bothered by details of precision than one who just does a thing which is 'good enough'.

  • I used to do that to test the volume levels, and how increased force influences that, it was temporary, until satisfactory conclusion was reached

    but some of my experiments were definitely risky

  • I used the baby door guards… you know the foam type ones you put across the door to stop them slamming. After around a week of realising that they don’t shut anymore, my little Angel got bored WinkInnocent As for the lights, furniture in front of till the compulsion dies Wink I moved his cupboard unit in front and he can’t reach up and over, even at 8 Wink

  • Not really, it was just something my G/F picked up and I tried and it seemed helpful. It sure saved me a lot of trips for aircraft to stores & back again to remember what it was I wanted...

    Sorry I can't be more helpful.

  • If you mean cupboard doors, it's a safety issue too and likewise with drawers. However I guess not when a drawer is closed leaving something peeping out, more to do with unfinished things.

    Interesting about portal brain. I am terrible at remembering what I went somewhere for. Are you able to explain further? Unfortunately going back doesn't always work and is frustrating when you know you were going to do something. Sometimes takes ages to remember.

  • I do this all the time... Leave a room, then when I get to the next room start wondering... No what was it I wanted from this room?! Now I know why.. Thanks! Grinning

  • It's useful behaviour if he grows up to live with a woman...

    I wish I had a compulsion to shut doors!

    Also an interesting (and useful) factoid about doorways & portals generally, is that when you pass through one, your brain tends to reset it's self for the new environment it expects on the other side of the door. which explains a lot of "lost keys" situations.

    As an aircraft mechanic I used to find myself arriving in the stores with no recollection of what part it was I was needing. After I learned about the portal/brain thing I used to duck back out into the hangar quickly if I found myself not remembering what I had come in for,  and it would then usually come back to me. I also took to reminding myself what I needed for stores AFTER exiting the aeroplane. 

  • Hello. Does he need doors to be closed in order to avoid the unpredictability of them slamming shut? Also he may turn lights on and off as he enjoys the sensory experience of light vs dark repeatedly. Do you know if these ‘obsessions’ are caused by anxiety or are they related to his sensory needs? 

    This page may be useful:

    https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/behaviour/obsessions

  • Don’t most schools have doors that close themselves. I’d expect propping doors open would be the taboo Thing in schools? fire regulations etc.