So frustrated

Who would anyone choose to be autistic? Who would go and tell a Dr they thought they were Autistic if they didn’t feel it in their bones and being? 
I’m getting quite fed up of hearing this scenario. I think it just boils down to money and stretched services. They’d rather fob you off than give you the assessment and subsequent support (which is often non existent anyway!)

I broached it twice. Not to a GP but to a nurse practitioner there. She wanted to know what a diagnosis would do, as she thought it shouldn’t matter. She said I had been married, had two great kids I should be proud of, and that I’ve had my own business. So what? Does this mean there’s no possibility I could be Autistic? She’s absolutely no idea how I feel, or what my life has been like since year dot. 

The NHS failed my recently diagnosed teen, so I refuse to wait a year or more for my turn. I had an hours consultation with a private psychologist who agreed to assess me based on what was discussed. He told me I could be assessed for free via the adult pathway. I prefer to go the private route for many reasons, even though it’s a financial struggle for me. 

Hi Catlover, thank you for taking the time to reply.

This situation has made me feel like I can’t trust my CPN. A lot of the time I feel like she minimises my struggles and during my appointments I feel rushed and she talks the most. She doesn’t get me. For a long time I’ve often thought am I misjudging her as I struggle with reading people but I don’t feel I am anymore and part of me doesn’t want to continue using the mental health services. 

My Cpn has also said similar things to me about people feeling the need to have a diagnosis when it’s not always necessary. People read about disabilities online and then think that matches them and then  want to have a label and become so focused on wanting a label that they don’t need.

She also said that she thought I manage very well in parenting two children on the spectrum who have different needs and look after my animals and a house on my own. Again trying to make me think well I manage to parent so you can’t be autistic or have adhd. I find it really hard when I’m up against a professional and trying to prove myself just to be listened to and taken seriously. 

Another user in the community has suggested to go for private assessment or ask for about the NHS right to choose but unfortunately in Scotland we don’t have the right to choose. I have also read that the NHS doesn’t recognise these diagnoses?

That’s great you have you diagnosis now it’s sounds like going private has helped you a lot but the only downfall is the cost. I’m sorry you and your son went through such a difficult time in order for him to receive a diagnosis. Hopefully he has some support and help in place to let him flourish in life. 

You know how you struggle, you know if you’d benefit from a diagnosis. No one can tell you how you should feel. And I agree that it is hard when they give you reasons why a label isn’t necessary. You do start to feel you’re blowing things out of proportion.

I want labels, so I can understand myself better, and make sense of my past. I’m doing it for me., not anyone else.
I am not diagnosed. Self diagnosed perhaps, though I need to hear it as a fact from a professional, or else it isn’t true. Do you know what I mean? 
My assessment process starts in December,

My teen is my daughter. She was diagnosed with several conditions; Autism, ADD and Dyspraxia all from the same assessment, which is why going private does have its advantages.

The cost is an issue, but do shop around as prices vary. I was allowed to choose how to pay, which was good. I decided to half at the start, and half when everything’s complete. I could have made more smaller payments to suit my budget, but dislike owing money. As long as our Psychologist knew in advance, he had no issues.

I think you’ll find that things aren’t as set in stone regarding the NHS recognising private diagnoses. I think the law has changed recently. Maybe just in the UK? I don’t know…. 

We waited 6 years to get someone to listen, and when she was finally referred and assessed, they said she didn’t have Autism (or anything else, for that matter!).

Several months later we asked for a second opinion, and while the GP agreed with us, he said the service would likely come up with the same result, as the assessment wasn’t geared to people like her.

You know how you struggle, you know if you’d benefit from a diagnosis. No one can tell you how you should feel. And I agree that it is hard when they give you reasons why a label isn’t necessary. You do start to feel you’re blowing things out of proportion.

I want labels, so I can understand myself better, and make sense of my past. I’m doing it for me., not anyone else.
I am not diagnosed. Self diagnosed perhaps, though I need to hear it as a fact from a professional, or else it isn’t true. Do you know what I mean? 
My assessment process starts in December,

My teen is my daughter. She was diagnosed with several conditions; Autism, ADD and Dyspraxia all from the same assessment, which is why going private does have its advantages.

The cost is an issue, but do shop around as prices vary. I was allowed to choose how to pay, which was good. I decided to half at the start, and half when everything’s complete. I could have made more smaller payments to suit my budget, but dislike owing money. As long as our Psychologist knew in advance, he had no issues.

I think you’ll find that things aren’t as set in stone regarding the NHS recognising private diagnoses. I think the law has changed recently. Maybe just in the UK? I don’t know…. 

We waited 6 years to get someone to listen, and when she was finally referred and assessed, they said she didn’t have Autism (or anything else, for that matter!).

Several months later we asked for a second opinion, and while the GP agreed with us, he said the service would likely come up with the same result, as the assessment wasn’t geared to people like her.

I know exactly what you mean! Finally Someone says that is okay to want the label.

A professional diagnosis allows you to know your autistic without the doubts in your head and the doubts of other other people! 

I want to be formally diagnosed and then it’s there on paper. It will stop others blaming my mental health when in fact I have bad mental health because I am expected to fit into an neurotyical world that isn’t built for me. I can better understand myself and help me understand why I struggled so greatly as a child and a teenager. 

There are downsides though I think I will be angry at why nobody picked up on anything when I was a child. When I look back it’s difficult to understand why as it would have very clear for anyone to see especially during nursery stage and high school! 

Apologies I just assumed your child was a boy, I Think I made that assumption because I have two sons. That would  have been a relief for you that your daughter was able to be diagnosed for her range of disabilities by the one psychologist after your bad experience previously with the Nhs assessment. Was the process a long? How did your daughter cope with the assessment process?