Published on 12, July, 2020
Hiya, I have looked at the advice and guidance but it just doesn't explain much. My daughter, 15, isn't eating much and I'm not sure why. Usually it's because she isn't happy and is in a low mood but she is happy at the moment. We have moved forward a step in school and she has ordered a lunchbox and has a ham wrap which is made for her lunch. At the moment she will have it with her but won't touch it but it's a big step forward and it's there if she wants it. She doesn't like eating in school or around other people. She can just about cope eating with me, or her step-dad alone.
We know she won't eat crunchy food in school but will at home. Anyways, she is eating very little. She doesn't have breakfast in the morning because she doesn't fancy the cereal or croissants she chose, and also because the builders are in the house. She doesn't eat in school, we may be lucky if she has a biscuit. She may have a small snack like a cake bar or yogurt. Then it's dinner and she doesn't tend to have it or wants it later but doesn't. So at the moment she is eating something very little and maybe a dinner if we are lucky. We don't know why and we are trying to get to the bottom but I was hoping you could see this from a different point of view and suggest something that may help.
We are still waiting for her to have dinner. She's had a packet of crisps and a yogurt but that's it. I let her help do the shopping and pick things but the last few weeks she's barely touched it.
Yes, they are very supportive and helpful and they handle situations in a calm and appropriate manner. This really helps my daughter especially because a fire alarm, which was not a drill, went off and they quickly ran to get her ear defenders and helped her out and told her she was doing really well and let her sit in the car park when everyone went back in to calm down. They are extremely helpful
Her school sound very supportive of her. I am glad you are moving forward
She is close to 2 members of staff, both female and she does have one on Monday for lunch. We have already spoken with school and it turns out that quite a few of the students don't like eating in school either. They have their own ways on getting her to eat. For example, they got her to eat a biscuit which is a huge improvement. She's also picked things from the snack box and take it home with her, she used to not be able to stay in the kitchen at all. They have now gotten her a bit of lunch on a plate next to her. We are definitely moving forward.
Same thing with drinking. She would never drink in school, even when she took her own bottle. Even in the heat and she is always wearing a jumper so she's sweating. They have managed to get her to have a cup next to her or on her desk and they took her to the shop and they picked out a lovely bottle which she has decorated and drunk out of once. We are improving slowly but she just does so much exercise during school and at the weekends. She needs to eat more.
is there a teacher she feels close to that she wouldn't mind eating in front of? I think that maybe you should ask for a meeting with the school, as you said they specialize in autism so they have probably had to deal with similar situations, they might have some ideas on what to do?
I'm sorry that you and your daughter are having such a tough time at the moment
piggy1401 said:could she maybe go to a room by herself to have her lunch? I am sure the school could maybe arrange that. is she diagnosed autistic?
She is diagnosed and is in a school which specializes in autism so they understand her a lot better than I do. She can go to a room by herself, usually the small sensory room, but I think a teacher usually sits with her and the other stands outside. Unless, when she is overwhelmed and has exploded, she will have time by herself but she still won't eat because she would be in a negative mood. She just can't be left alone so it's hard.
I don't think she is worried about school, she doesn't want to come home some days to be honest. She likes school. Like I said, she doesn't eat much at home either.
I completely understand where your daughter is coming from, although I don't have an issue eating at home (my mum would probably say I eat too much when I'm at home). I don't eat anything when I am at school, I just feel so self-conscious. is there anything that your daughter wouldn't mind eating at school (maybe ask and tell her it could be anything), I went through a phase of eating chocolate in school but that was it, not quite sure why that didn't make me feel self-conscious but as my mum said, it was better than me eating nothing.
could she maybe go to a room by herself to have her lunch? I am sure the school could maybe arrange that. is she diagnosed autistic?
from what I can understand, your daughter has got worse over the last few weeks? so basically since she has been back at school? i would assume it has got worse because she is worried about school so it probably doesn't matter what she chooses when you go shopping?