Child's violent behavior

Hi everyone 

Just wanted some advice on how to manage challenging and violent behaviour. My daughter is 4 years old and displays violent behaviour when disregulated. She is verbal and high functioning (waiting on diagnosis but I believe she has autism). Sometimes there is no visible triggers and sometimes there is. She attends nursery at school and has been violent to the children to the point that parents are now questioning the behaviour of my child who keeps hurting their children. This is a very difficult position to be in and I am finding it hard to cope with. 

Any advice would be greatly appreciated 

Thanks 

Parents
  • children play fight all the time ... autistic children, not so much. As an autistic child everything is very black and white. So if some one shoves, slaps or elbows you you tend to interpret it as a full on attack and respond with full force, no holds barred, no pulling of punches.

    In the rough and tumble of the school yard you'll probably never persuade your child never to respond violently when others are instigating conflict. So instead teach them about reasonable force. Using only enough force to stop other people hurting you. It won't necessarily stop the conflicts but it might make them a lot less serious and more manageable.

    In my personal experience if it were the environment that was frustrating her her violence would be mostly directed towards the teacher. If her violence is mostly directed to other students its probably their behaviour which is provoking her or otherwise causing her extreme frustration. The first question to ask is are they picking fights with her, jabbing her with a pencil when teachers not looking etc.

  • Her violence is to everyone, family, teachers, classmates. Even her own sister, she could be playing lovely and all of a sudden she would just hit her. Sometimes we can tell its coming and other times it can catch us off guard 

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