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Emotionally and mentally drained teen

ParentingAutism

Hiya, I'm worried about my teen a bit. Today wasn't the best school day. Basically she went into school happy and her first lesson was good as well as her 5th lesson. That's 2/6, the others weren't too good. It was all because of the atmosphere in the classroom. Her buddy/friend is usually happy and they chat together a lot but today she wasn't in the best mood. Due to this, my daughter thought: 'she isn't talking to me. She's not in the best mood. She doesn't want to be my friend'. 

As well as that, she jumped the gate, which she hasn't done in a while, and just exploded in tears because she was so overwhelmed. She luckily went back to school site and chilled out. But she didn't go to any lessons but the 2 and 5 minutes of her last one. She is now in bed, absolutely exhausted and mentally drained and has not spoken to anyone and didn't really eat dinner. 

Adding on to this, apparently when she left site but went back, she layed on the floor near the site, where the head teacher came out and for the whole period she was there, she did not move, speak and just froze but it seemed like she was trying to communicate in some why but just couldn't so was getting more upset and frustrated? 

I just need some help because she has also been having flashbacks/nightmares of her past, (which I've mentioned before). She also anxious because she's moving up a year in 2 weeks. All this is making her overwhelmed but I just don't know how to help her because she doesn't want the help and wants to deal with everything herself. What do I do??? Thanks again 

  • in reply to Daniel

    Thank you so much Daniel. Her friend explained that she's worried about a family member due to some issues happening so now they are both looking after each other and talking again. I can definitely tell you that she is masking her autism and always has done. We are trying to put things in place for her and they have been working so far. Thanks again

  • ParentingAutism,

    The anxiety can be what's fueling this making her mentally drained and exhausted, especially if she chooses to hide her autistic traits.

    I've listened to some parents and their children are over emphatic, the situation with your daughter's friend can be far more overwhelming for her than others. Some autistic people are unable to watch fictional characters be hurt in any way, it emotionally overwhelms them as if the character and they are in person. 

    I would try breaking it down into blocks. You can see if her friend will privately talk with her explaining why she was upset, regularly some autistic people place the blame on themselves which could be adding to her mental state if she's doing so.

    Just being, frozen, rocking or shaking sounds like she's holding things in and is having a difficulty to know how to express them, masking alone is stressful, depressing and exhausting.

    If all this began around the same time as anxiety and flashbacks it can be assumed anxiety is the cause, that she's in uncertainty about everything, the future, whether she should communicate or not, jumping the gate, accepting help and uncertain about her friend. 

    The first move is most likely to do something that can reduce her anxiety, whether it's seeing a professional or doing some activity.