• Replies 15 replies
  • Subscribers 71 subscribers
  • Views 3066 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

First ASD assessment | Advice on how to tell my child

Mum of 11yo | Waiting diagnosis

I have just joined this page. I hope someone can advise me.

My son has his first ASD assessment at the beginning of April and I wondered how parents/carers spoke to their children about the assessment.

He is 11 years old, low self-esteem, very communicative at home and to anyone that meets him for a few hours may not realise he has some struggles. He hates assessments, hates to be singled out and is afraid of what is being said about him. He asks that I don't tell family members about him, not even his good news and would hate to know I had to complete a 'family story' that included much of his life. He will not want to go for the assessment, and has a keen sense of injustice at being assessed and asked questions. He also won't care how easy/hard it is.

I want to build trust, so talking to him about it far enough ahead is important. However, it may end up in him refusing to go and days of ear ache and bad moods.

Any ideas on where to start with him? Thank you for reading.

Parents

  • Can you try to phrase it in a positive way? You could mention some things that he's unusually good at and say that you/his teachers think he is likely to have a similar kind of brain as [insert name of suitable ASD role model]. Finding out that Greta Thunberg, Bill Gates, maybe Jane Austen, Guy Martin etc are/were on the spectrum helped me think about it more as a positive thing. 

    Also, try not to make it a big deal, tell him that he's still the same person no matter what the professionals say. I used to get upset when adults acted all 'concerned' so it might be best to avoid that.

Reply

  • Can you try to phrase it in a positive way? You could mention some things that he's unusually good at and say that you/his teachers think he is likely to have a similar kind of brain as [insert name of suitable ASD role model]. Finding out that Greta Thunberg, Bill Gates, maybe Jane Austen, Guy Martin etc are/were on the spectrum helped me think about it more as a positive thing. 

    Also, try not to make it a big deal, tell him that he's still the same person no matter what the professionals say. I used to get upset when adults acted all 'concerned' so it might be best to avoid that.

Children