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Advice please - should I pursue a diagnosis?

Claire

Hi. I'm new here and have been going over and over my thoughts and feelings for months! I thought best to ask those that know...

I have a 9 year old son (middle one of 3 children) who I have long thought may have autism. I work with people with learning disabilities and/or autism which gave me more of an insight. He doesn't struggle at school and has a group of friends he hangs around with. However, he can get very anxious, has sensory issues, needs a routine, will not join new groups (football, cricket teams etc) despite enjoying the activity. He hasn't done it for a while, but can have major meltdowns at home. Ironically he has been much better during this lockdown, but I think that is because he is still going to school (I'm studying to be an LD nurse and am on placement so count as a keyworker) and the class groups are smaller. He only has one of his friendship group in school with him at the moment which again, I think helps him. He also doesn't have to be taken to and from his siblings' football matches and doesn't have to go to swimming lessons (which he gets anxiety about before going but is ok when he is there) but can sit at home on his computer console. During the first lockdown he was learning from home and it was a major struggle.

I have spoken to friends and family about my thoughts regarding him having autism, but I don't know whether to pursue a diagnosis. If he's happy and getting on ok, is it needed? I don't want to necessarily "label him" and for autism to be a get-out clause. With his behaviour at home (often angry and irritated quickly, hits out at siblings if they're the reason for that) I often think to myself "it's due to autism" but don't want that to be the reason to excuse his behaviour to his siblings. At the same time, if they understand his neurodiversity will they avoid triggering him? Please understand, I see nothing wrong with having a child with autism, I am just wondering what the advantages of a diagnosis are for a high-functioning child? I'm a single parent so don't have the opportunity to discuss with his dad, but he's also never understood him properly and I don't think would see a need to do anything about it (possibly wouldn't understand the features of autism either).

I also don't know where to go first if I did pursue - school or GP?!

Any help and advice appreciated.

Thanks

Claire

Parents

  • Hi Claire

    Your situation sounds very similar to mine I also have a 9 year old (daughter) who is also the middle child of 3.

    I was approached by her school as she has social difficulties and only really has "1 friend" 

    We have been referred to paediatrics and have had a few appointments but this was before the current situation so things have slowed slightly and to be honest I feel like we've hit a road block Disappointed I understand there will be a lot of child in the same situation however I feel like I need to push a diagnosis but just don't know how or where or even who to turn to.

Reply

  • Hi Claire

    Your situation sounds very similar to mine I also have a 9 year old (daughter) who is also the middle child of 3.

    I was approached by her school as she has social difficulties and only really has "1 friend" 

    We have been referred to paediatrics and have had a few appointments but this was before the current situation so things have slowed slightly and to be honest I feel like we've hit a road block Disappointed I understand there will be a lot of child in the same situation however I feel like I need to push a diagnosis but just don't know how or where or even who to turn to.

Children
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