13 year old daughter

Hello Sodapop

We have been looking at advice from The Girl with the Curly Hair (Alis Rowe) and Siena Castellon to understand and help our 17 year old daughter.

Thinking about sleep problems when my daughter was younger she would have a story tape/CD. She would listen to exactly the same one every single night, fall asleep and the tape/CD would run until the end. It took a while to find the right one but in retrospect I think the right tone of voice. She also needed the right environment. This included her muslin comfort cloth, heavy duvet and blanket, window closed and night light. Aged 17 she still needs all these things in place but the necessity of a story tape/CD has stopped. She does like a long time to actually get to bed, about two hours including shower and hair washing. Before this ritual starts she also likes to watch something on the TV that she has seen a million times before, something reassuring and comforting. We have also used aromatherapy oils in her bath and aromatherapy spray on her pillow.

Now that she is much older she takes Nytol or Kalms herbal sleeping pills on the nights when she is most anxious. The packet says they are not for people under 18 years but her doctor was happy for her to take them as long as it wasn't on a nightly basis.

Honey milk (warm milk with honey in it) helps her when things are really bad. 

I am also researching into weighted blankets for her as she does like heavy bedding even when it is hot.

Getting dressed, if not in school uniform, used to be a problem and sometimes it still is. I think that a lot of this is to do with decision making and sensory issues regarding the 'feeling' of the clothing as much as the look. 

Going to school was a battle. In the end we used to drive her back and forth to lessons so that she did not have to be in school during breaks and lunchtime. She was also supported heavily by the Family Support Team, used a dedicated room to retreat to if necessary, and had special permission to leave class if she became overwhelmed by the environment. She was also excused from assembly (too many people, too much noise, too unruly) and dropped some classes. This was a huge effort on both her and our part but she did survive, make friends and ended up achieving well. I would rather that she had just been more 'comfortable' and less anxious but for someone with autism I do not think this is possible in mainstream school. It is just the wrong environment.

Good luck

Hello Sodapop

We have been looking at advice from The Girl with the Curly Hair (Alis Rowe) and Siena Castellon to understand and help our 17 year old daughter.

Thinking about sleep problems when my daughter was younger she would have a story tape/CD. She would listen to exactly the same one every single night, fall asleep and the tape/CD would run until the end. It took a while to find the right one but in retrospect I think the right tone of voice. She also needed the right environment. This included her muslin comfort cloth, heavy duvet and blanket, window closed and night light. Aged 17 she still needs all these things in place but the necessity of a story tape/CD has stopped. She does like a long time to actually get to bed, about two hours including shower and hair washing. Before this ritual starts she also likes to watch something on the TV that she has seen a million times before, something reassuring and comforting. We have also used aromatherapy oils in her bath and aromatherapy spray on her pillow.

Now that she is much older she takes Nytol or Kalms herbal sleeping pills on the nights when she is most anxious. The packet says they are not for people under 18 years but her doctor was happy for her to take them as long as it wasn't on a nightly basis.

Honey milk (warm milk with honey in it) helps her when things are really bad. 

I am also researching into weighted blankets for her as she does like heavy bedding even when it is hot.

Getting dressed, if not in school uniform, used to be a problem and sometimes it still is. I think that a lot of this is to do with decision making and sensory issues regarding the 'feeling' of the clothing as much as the look. 

Going to school was a battle. In the end we used to drive her back and forth to lessons so that she did not have to be in school during breaks and lunchtime. She was also supported heavily by the Family Support Team, used a dedicated room to retreat to if necessary, and had special permission to leave class if she became overwhelmed by the environment. She was also excused from assembly (too many people, too much noise, too unruly) and dropped some classes. This was a huge effort on both her and our part but she did survive, make friends and ended up achieving well. I would rather that she had just been more 'comfortable' and less anxious but for someone with autism I do not think this is possible in mainstream school. It is just the wrong environment.

Good luck