Please help, advice needed - 5 year old daughter possible ASD??

New to the site so bare with me. 

My husband and I have 3 wonderful girls ranging from 14 to 1.

My middle daughter from the age of 2 started to really struggle with sensory processing, started with shoes and socks and now it's pretty much every item of clothes, hair always has to be tight, doesn't like walking by groups of teenagers on way home holds ears, last few months can't eat anything that has a skin. When something goes she phycially cannot cope and we have multiple massive meltdowns.

She is a creature of routine and doesn't like change and quite a few rituals now that if they don't go to plan cause meltdowns until we get it right. 

Wrong pencil, knife and fork, food cut wrong, teddies not right on bed, bed not smooth etc if something in her world isn't right she can't cope and meltdowns. 

I find she holds things in until she sees me again after school and the whole evening is full of meltdowns where I can't really peace what she says together to work out where to start helping her. Hubby can collect and been a good day but as soon as she gets to me at the school gates it all comes out. She also hates me leaving, I can't even pop to the shop. She gets so distressed especially if hubby trys to remove her from me. 

She had no physically and learning delays she is a very bright girl. She struggles a bit with friends. 

I've recently spoken to docs who have put a referral in to the paediatricians. Going through the evidence pack we noticed a lot more things. How literal she is, she really doesn't get jokes, lines everything up, speech, body language... We ended up ticking post things.

I've also had assessment with the school nurse who was brilliant and told me to reach out here and implement anything that may help. 

I guess some idea of the road ahead would be good, have your daughters been the same and later diagnosis with something. Any advice gratefully received I jisy want to help her. I've tried flash cards but they made the getting dressed better but it just went to crap after and she would be naked at the door. Worry doll and peddle to fiddle with just caught more distress as make her clothes bumpy.

Her angry is getting worse and affects everyone a lot.