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Where do I go for help?

NAS67724

Hi everyone.

I am a parent of a 3 year old little boy who is on the spectrum. He is non verbal and not able to do much by himself without assistance.

Although deep down I have known that he had autism for long time, since I heard the words from the paediatrician all my emotions have come flooding back.

I struggle a lot, I am already on medication for depression however, I feel I know the cause of my struggles. I just can't accept that my precious sweet boy will never have a normal life. My heart hurts, its all so overwhelming and I feel like I never will get over this. I feel such a sense of grief watching him struggle every day.

He is the most caring, happy and content little boy ever and I know that he knows the world no other way. But I just can't snap out of feeling this way. I feel I want to talk to someone about this and let it all out but don't know where to go for help. I was thinking of going to see a councilor/therapist maybe..  has anyone ever tried this?

Sorry for the Sad long post. I know its not all about me at all. I'm the lucky one. I just want to feel better so that I can be the best for my little boy.

Parents

  • Hi

    I am pretty much in the same situation as yourself my boy has recently turned 4 and was diagnosed about 8 months ago to have ASC as they now call it. 

    He does make progress every so often and does new things

    The thing killing me inside was literally what you said "I just can't accept that my precious sweet boy will never have a normal life" until I done some research reading and started speaking to experts but the best moment which has given me some assurance was when I rung someone who runs martial arts classes for people with special needs and a well versed man answered and said my kid is too small to start lessons yet and started asking question about him and his diagnosis and then about 10 minutes later said the only reason I ask about your kid is that I am also on the spectrum and was very similar to at my kid at his age. This has brought me some hope as I learned while quizzing him that he leads a pretty normal life. Has a profession is married and has children (bearing in mind everyones perception of normal could be different)

    I think the main thing is getting the diagnosis at this age gives us an advantage of being able to put things in place which can help kids and give them a higher chance at succeeding in life

    Does he attend nursery? I found my kid learned and benefited a lot from here. Has he been seen by the pre school teaching team

    In regards to speaking to someone depending on where you are based, your council may have a dedicated early autisim model organisation. when your child was diagnosed did the paediatrician refer you to anywhere else? when we got our diagnosis we were refered to a handful of organisations. there was also a helpline i saw mentioned on here which you can speak to. i will have a look for the number or maybe one of the other members can provide details.

    Also just a note to add-some researchers believe Einstein had autism and there are a lot of famous/successful people alive not that have autism so don't let this get you down  

  • in reply to NAS68628

    Thank you so much for your reply!

    Yes he did attend a private nursery for over a year just before lockdown but has not been for a while. It definitely helped to bring him along and out of his shell a little.

     He is due to start nursery at school soon and support is currently being put in place ready for him to attend. I am hoping that is going to help him too. 

    I know many autistic children go on to lead happy 'normal' lives.. and for me I think it is the unknown that scares me. I always question will he be able to have friends and a social life, will he go on to have a family of his own or will he live at home forever with me helping to take care of him? Not that any of this is a problem to me. I love him so much I would quite happily keep him with me forever haha. I just want him to have a good quality of life!

    He is still so young and everything is all so new I am hoping that with the right support and time I am able to just focus on all the positives x

Reply
  • in reply to NAS68628

    Thank you so much for your reply!

    Yes he did attend a private nursery for over a year just before lockdown but has not been for a while. It definitely helped to bring him along and out of his shell a little.

     He is due to start nursery at school soon and support is currently being put in place ready for him to attend. I am hoping that is going to help him too. 

    I know many autistic children go on to lead happy 'normal' lives.. and for me I think it is the unknown that scares me. I always question will he be able to have friends and a social life, will he go on to have a family of his own or will he live at home forever with me helping to take care of him? Not that any of this is a problem to me. I love him so much I would quite happily keep him with me forever haha. I just want him to have a good quality of life!

    He is still so young and everything is all so new I am hoping that with the right support and time I am able to just focus on all the positives x

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