Published on 12, July, 2020
Does anyone else’s child try to stop you speaking to people. My son is 8 and whebever I’m talking to someone out and about or on school run or if someone just says hello in passing and I respond he will shout ‘shut up or don’t talk”. He doesn’t like talking to people and that’s fine but he now tried to stops me. It’s embarrassing and rude and also I have to stop otherwise he’s will continue to shout!
Ive tried to speak to him about it and how it makes me feel but don’t seem to get anywhere.
Hi,
Yes, my boy with HFA always did this. For a long time it was very isolating, as a baby and toddler he would grab and scratch my face and pull it away from people I was sitting talking to, beat me, pull me away and shout. Social gatherings were really tough. For my boy it was lack of confidence and his own intense boredom and anxiety around people that don't share any of his interests. Possibly also worried about losing me. He's 9 now, and something changed in him this year, his teacher is nice and allowed his complicated little classroom friendship to develop so he appreciates that he needs friends and I need friends too. Suddenly, he isn't feeling quite so isolated and can share me a bit (though he still pulls me away and shouts the odd awkward thing). Perhaps you can come up with some kind of game or distraction he can use to help him tolerate the short spells when you speak to other people. My boy reads a lot so he whips out a book/comic when I'm "talking really boringly to boring people" : /
Thank you. It’s nice to know I’m not the only one. I’ll have to think of something to distract him. It’s just seems so strange that even just a hello he won’t tolerate!! it’s almost as though he just wants to control situations.Thats good news your boy can now tolerate you speaking to people and gives me hope!